learning about emotions..

We have seen a need to help Chance express his emotions. Chance has always been very expressive, but we have noticed that he does not seem to know how to get certain emotions out.
We have heard from some professionals who work with deaf children, that it is common to have to work on emotions with them. The thing is, since Chance has been deaf since about 13 months, so it is hard to know what effects are caused by the deafness, and what may just be Chance's personality.

Chance is very expressive and loving. And he is not shy about letting us know when he does not like something. There have been times however, when as I look into Chance's eyes, I can tell that a situation has upset him, but if I ask him about it, he tells me he is fine. He has literally had tears in his eyes and when I have asked what is wrong, he will tell me, " I am not sad!" Uh huh.
I think that for a while, Chance could not express some of his most basic feelings and wants. Now he can do that, but he has to learn how to express his thoughts and feelings so that we know how he is feeling. It is interesting, because, Chance is so expressive and sometimes he is an open book. But other times, he seems unsure of how to let his emotions out. For instance, when he has had his feelings hurt... I don't think he knows what to do with that. My experience with children has been that most kids go through some kind of a stage where a favorite phrase is "you hurt my feelings!" Chance of course, did not have that opportunity, he was not hearing enough to focus on hurt feelings. He was focused on figuring out what was going on in a world that had gone silent for him.

I don't want to give Chance feelings that he does not have. I have witnessed situations where I think "I bet Chance didn't like that," but Chance is reluctant to talk about it. I have seen Chance get frustrated and cry when he feels that his friends aren't getting his message. I encourage him to talk to them and tell them that he does not like that or that he wants them to listen to him. Sometimes, he will run down the hall and slam the door to his bedroom after something has upset him. We are trying to teach him to talk and tell us what the problem is.

One thing that Chance does when he is going through something is to become more snuggly. He has been more snuggly the past few weeks and I know that something is going on, but I don't know what it is. It is amazing what effects language, or lack of, and communication have on us.
So, for now, we are trying to help Chance realize that he can express his emotions and that he does not have to hide them. He has the language to get them out now.