Pages

Sunday, April 03, 2011

Chance sings a solo

Chance tried out for a solo part today in music class. If you wanted a solo part, you stood up in front of the class and sang a song while the whole class listened. Quite an act of bravery I would say at age 10. Heck, that is an act of bravery at ages 7-103. Singing in front of people takes courage and confidence.
Chance got up and started to sing, and then some of the students started to laugh at him. I don't know that Chance would have told us about this incident, but the chorus teacher at the school is also Chance's guitar teacher and he told Chance's dad when we took the boys for their guitar lessons.
The teacher told the laughing students that they were being rude and and he would not tolerate it in class and that everyone was to be treated with respect. (In his words, he "came unglued!!!") Chance told us that one of the boys came over and apologized after class.
Our little Chance's confidence was a little shattered and so I went in to do some damage control.
First off, I explained to Chance that he was incredibly brave to stand up and sing in front of the class and that his dad and I were proud of him.
Then I told him that I didn't know why, but some kids are just mean and rude. They make fun of kids who don't shoot the basketball that well (Chance is a good shot and plays the game,"Speed", at recess), or kids who don't wear clothes that they like or kids who are different than them. I told him that even adults have people who are rude to them sometimes. And sometimes, kids don't realize that they are being mean.
I told him that we just have to ignore those people who laugh, and that while it can hurt our feelings when they make fun of us, to try not to worry about those few kids. There are many many more people who are not laughing and we can't let the few who are stop us from doing the things we want to do.
I acknowledged that it was hurtful that those kids were rude and laughed, but that most of the class was not laughing. Then I told Chance about the time when I was in school and I went to try out for a part in a play and I sat in the back of the room watching other kids try out in front of an audience and then I chickened out and I never tried.
"You did?" Chance asked surprised.
Then I told him,"Chance, it takes courage to stand up and sing in front of the class, and if you want to sing a solo later in the school year, I think you should get up and try out again."
Chance took this in for a minute and kind of slowly shook his head.
I think he will try out again if it is something he wants to do. I hope that is the case because I don't want him to loose his confidence. I also don't want him to get a complex about performing in front of people. He may have kids that laugh at him due to the fact that it takes him longer to learn a song and sing right on key. I want him to have the confidence to go forward anyway. These kids have no idea what a miracle Chance's hearing is and how much harder he has to work than they do to sing. I want him to be able to get past those negative kids and press forward. Chance can sing, and he is getting better and taking lessons to teach him to hear the differences in the notes and then translate that into his singing voice. And he can do it. He'll have to learn to block out the naysayers who always seem to show up.
We have been very blessed in the fact that Chance has not had a lot of ridicule from other kids due to his deafness. I don't want him to acquire a complex about it now. I'm not even sure he equates his deafness to the laughing kids. I just want him to be able to dim the noise of the naysayers and go forward to where he wants to be.

2 comments:

Ammie said...

Kids can be so mean!! Ugh! Breaks my heart. I think that was a very brave thing for Chance to do. I hope the teacher also told the parents of the boys who laughed at him. I would want to know if my kids were being rude to other kids. They would be in big trouble. I think you said it well to Chance.

Ann said...

I think you did a wonderful job in your explanation of the situation!