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Wednesday, January 19, 2011

The love of a brother

Chance has had a steady and passionately devoted right hand man as he has traveled this path of deafness.

When Chance was first diagnosed, there were some friends of his brothers in the neighborhood who would complain and run away when Chance would come to join them in play. Chance's brother told them that if Chance didn't play, then he didn't either.

This past year at school, some girls were constantly hitting and poking Chance's brother. It was all supposed to be fun and games but Chance's brother did not really like it. He endured it. One day these girls decided to start doing the same thing to Chance. His brother stood up and said,"Nobody hits my brother!"

When Chance was first diagnosed and entered preschool through the "School for the Deaf," Chance was traumatized and cried and cried when I dropped him off each day. I would watch through the two way mirror heartbroken as my baby struggled. The school asked me if Chance had ever been away from home for a night. I told him he had not. "No weekends away with grandma or grandpa?" they asked. I replied that he had had no such weekend. I had a new baby that prohibited me from staying at the school for long and it was devastating to see how Chance struggled. His world had been turned upside down seemingly overnight. Chance was having multiple tests done to check his hearing, he had just received hearing aids and now he was thrown into a world with lots of people that he had never seen before. Plus he was going through the summer when other kids his age were at home playing.


Chance and his brother dressed up for Halloween

Enter Chance's brother who volunteered to attend the older class in the same building as a model for language (kids who hear normally and can model language for the little deaf children). Chance and his brother did not attend the same classes, but they saw each other at recess and during lunch. The teachers told me Chance would run to his brother when it was lunch time and his brother would take him under his wing and help him feel secure.


This meant that Chance's brother was also missing out on summer playing but he never complained once.

When Chance signed up to sing in the Alexander Graham Bell Association's Speech Fair last year, it became apparent that though Chance knew the song quite well, it was a difficult song with many shifts and he had a hard time staying on tune during some parts. Chance's brother who was in chorus with Chance volunteered to go up on stage and sing with Chance. He sang real soft, just enough so that Chance could stay on tune. Chance's brother knew it was Chance's moment to shine and simply stood back and smiled as the applause came in after the performance.

Chance's brother has always made sure that in settings with large groups etc. that Chance was part of things and knew what was going on. A neighbor who used to watch the kids while I had appointments etc. said that she was so impressed with how Chance's brother and sister looked out for Chance to make sure that he knew when they were being offered snacks or knew what was going on in the game etc. She said that you could see the love between them.

This past year Chance has been in a school that is a little different than most schools for kids Chance's age. Instead of being in one class all day, Chance rotates through several different classes with different teachers in each class. It is the first year this school has been open and there have been lots of changes and adjustments to be made during the first several months as things get going.


Chance has struggled some with all of the changes. Enter his brother once again. Staff at the school worked out a deal with Chance that if he attended each class he earned points that he could redeem for a little time during the afternoon with.....his brother.

Chance has been a little trooper and forged ahead in an astounding way through his deafness. He has had a most devoted ally during the process in his brother and it has been a great blessing to both of them and a wondrous thing to watch as a parent.

4 comments:

Ammie said...

Brings tears to my eyes! So great to have a big brother to count on!

Emma said...

Ok - this post just makes me want to cry. What a sweet brother, and what a gifted mom to be able to capture the moments in writing like that!

Yanti said...

Lovely post.Chance is so lucky to have such a wonderful brother.You too must be a wonderful mom to be able to nurture such beautiful siblings love.

Ann said...

This truly was touching. I've always known how amazing Chance is, and how amazing his parents are. Now to see how amazing his brother is also touches my heart. You guys have a wonderful family. The children have great role models on that path in their parents.