Self-advocating

One of the main topics they stress to you as a parent of a deaf child is to teach your child to advocate for themselves. They won't always have you with them and besides, they have to have the ability to go out into the world and do things like tell their teacher when they can't hear, or have someone repeat the instructions when they missed what was said.

We have tried to ensure that Chance is expected to be as independent in the same things his older brother was at his age..whatever age that may be at the time.

That self advocating came to the forefront today when I got a phone call from Chance.

Chance called me from a neighbors house to ask me if his two friends could come to his little brother's T-ball game so that they could all play tennis during the game at the tennis courts at the Junior High.

Apparently though, the details had not been worked out before he called me because he kept talking to friends and working things out while we were on the phone. This was OK, but I was surprised that Chance would carry on a discussion with me, two friends and all of the background noise that was coming from his friend's house where they have 4 young children that I could hear making noise. He usually does not appreciate lots of noise while he is on the phone and will sometimes hand the phone to me if he is talking to someone and there is too much background noise on either end of the line.

The talking went back and forth for a minute, with Chance asking me if he could invite his friends, then telling his friend to ask his mom, then asking me what time the game started, then having his friend tell his mom etc. etc.

Then, Chance yelled, "EVERYONE QUIET!" Then a little softer, he added,"I'm on the phone."

Wow. Chance told the neighbors to be quiet in their own house? I think he was talking to all of his friend's siblings and not his friend's parents. Chance is not that brave enough to tell parents to be quiet. That is a good thing:)

It is true that he has been playing at this neighbor's house since he was 3 years old and it is the home of his oldest friend. But should he yell at all of them to be quiet?

Perhaps I should have a little talk with Chance and tell him that he should limit yelling at people to be quiet when he is on the phone when he is at someone else's house:)

Or perhaps he could ask everyone BEFORE he makes the call to please be quiet so he can hear on the phone.

Chance self advocating is a good thing. Maybe we should focus a little on technique now:)