Discussions on a Long Drive...

Ohhhh the beauty of long car rides with the family. So many memories are made along with interesting occurrences that you can all talk about forever.

On the Road Again... Just Can't Wait to Get on the Road Again...

Our family recently got back from such a trip. We drove across the country until we found ourselves in the state of Illinois. That is several states away from us and required three long days of driving EACH WAY. That is a total of 6 days of blissful travel in case you are counting. The days in the car really weren't that bad. We tried to visit interesting sights along the way and we all made memories to last a life time.

One such memory came about due to a movie the kids were talking about called,"The Best Two Years". The movie takes place in The Netherlands and has a joke about someone asking for sliced bread. Only instead of asking for sliced bread, the man asks for circumcised bread since the two words sound awfully alike in Dutch.

Chance and his brother at Winter Quarters Historic Site

Chance's older brother asked about the joke and we told him what it meant. He blushed a little and then said,"Oh, so that is why they are all laughing!"

Chance did not hear our explanation of the joke since he was in the back of the car and there was lots of extra noise at the time.

So, we told Chance's brother who was sitting in the middle seat to tell Chance what the joke was about.

His brothers eyes got big and he said something like,"What? I don't want to have to explain it to him! That's embarrassing!"

We made him do it anyway. Chance could not hear us, not when trying to tell him details like a joke.

A light went on in Chance's eyes as he got the joke and he laughed.

You just never know what you might learn about while on a cross country road trip with the family.

Our one and only day of balcony seating

Today we attended church in a beautiful building called a tabernacle. It is an older building built in 1909. There have been some improvements since then of course, such as indoor plumbing which I am a BIG fan of:)

The building has charm and little touches of elegance that they used to build into such buildings back in the day. We attend church here about every 6 months as it a time when several wards meet together so a larger venue is needed.

A note as to what a ward and stake are:
A ward is a group of church members that live with in a specified radius and meet together to worship each week. A ward usually consists of roughly 300 people and is presided over by a bishop who cares for and looks after the people in his ward. A stake is a group of about 7 wards and typically consists of about 2,000 people with a stake president presiding over the 7 wards. These numbers can vary depending on where in the world you are located. These wards and stakes can be found all over the world in many different counties using many different languages. About every 6 months, a stake meets together to receive instruction from the stake president and his counselors. This merits the need for a bigger meeting place and so we use the tabernacle in our area.

In years past, we have sat in the basement area where we are close to the bathrooms and where we watch the proceedings on a television. This area is great for families with young children as there is a hallway outside where you can let the little ones stretch their legs after sitting for a while and there are bathrooms close by. The meeting lasts about 2 hours so there is a need to stretch ones legs when you are a little kid:) Plus, if we are honest with ourselves, we know that sometimes we have sat in the basement because we have not arrived early enough to get another seat in the chapel. Mostly though, we sit in the basement because it is best for young kids:)

Today, we decided to graduate to the balcony of the old building. We had a sweeping view of the stage and the chapel below. We could see in detail the beautiful decorative work along the ceilings and railings. It was a great place to be to be spiritually fed.

As the first speaker got under way however, I found that I had to focus in order to hear him. Then I thought of Chance and wondered what he was hearing. I leaned over and asked him,"Chance, can you hear?" He despondently answered,"I can't hear anything." (which would help explain why he kept having issues with his sister. When one can't hear, one has time to focus on other things and can be more irritated by little sisters...who it should be mentioned was not an innocent victim in this scenario)

Beautiful old building, with minimal acoustic stability.

There was still an hour and 35 minutes left in the meeting which was much too long for Chance to be expected to just sit not hearing. So, I began to check out the seats below from our balcony view to see if there was another place closer to the podium so Chance could hear. As luck would have it, there were a few seats on pews off to the side of the stage where a television screen had been set up so you could see the speaker.

We could not take the entire family up to the new seats(OK, maybe we could have but we were not ready to take several young children up to the front of the chapel where they could be seen by everyone and where there was not room to stretch little legs and noise made would be heard through out the chapel). Thankfully, other families seemed to feel the same way so there were some seats still available in this area.

In a tender and loving gesture, Chance's brother who it should be noted is always there for his brother, volunteered to go sit up on the side of the stage with Chance so he could hear. I escorted the boys down the stairs and waited at the back of the room while they made their way up to the seats on the side of the stage. I then waited for the signal that told me if Chance could hear there.......an intricate system that required the boys to give me a thumbs up or down.

The boys flashed a thumbs up sign and then I headed back up to the balcony seat. I could see the boys from up there and they sat so reverently down there together it did my heart proud.

At the dinner table at home, we discussed what was talked about at stake conference and Chance was able to tell us what he had learned since he could actually hear after the move.

We have now learned that when we next attend church in the tabernacle, our family needs to get there extra early so we can sit in the chapel down by the podium so that Chance can hear. Or stick to our seats in the basement. The balcony is a beautiful place to sit, but Chance is more than worth it so we can give up the lofty seating from here on out:)

Under the bed

"I hate it when my implant falls off of my bed and lands under my bed during the night. Especially since under my bed is a wild wilderness of stuff."
This is the thought that I imagine Chance had when he realized that is implant had fallen under his bed after he fell asleep.
How is this for natural consequence parenting?
Clean under your bed, you'll find your implant!
Chance has not appreciated only having one implant today, yet he has realized that in order to find the other one, he must search under the bed.......in depth.
Ahhh, the natural laws of the universe at work:)
The thing is, I know he will clean at least some of it because he can not stand only having one implant for very long.

Disclaimer: Chance shares a bedroom with his brother and each of them claim the stuff under the bed belongs to the other one and should therefore be cleaned by the owner.
So, until the items under the bed are unearthed, we won't know if Chance is to be blamed for the mess or not.
The plot thickens.

Chance can't hear the cheers, but we yell encouragement anyway

Funny thing about Chance being on the swim team. Even though he can't hear us cheer, we cheer him on just as loud as we do his brother. It just seems wrong to cheer enthusiastically for his brother and then stand silently by as Chance swims. We adore both of them and want them both to know that they have fans in the stands!
I think Chance can feel our vibes of encouragement even if he doesn't hear us yelling out his name or telling him things like,"Come on, bring her on home!"

I wonder what it is like to swim with out hearing all of the voices and noise bouncing around? Sometimes those swimming event places are just plain loud. For other swimmers the noise is part of the race.
Chance's race is blissfully quiet. Or is it blissful? He doesn't know any different and it seems that you could concentrate on your strokes with out having to wonder,"What did I just hear? Did they say Dan was winning?"

Hmmmmm. To be a part of Chance's world for a minute would be really interesting.
In the mean time, we continue to give a shout out,"Go Chance!"

The missed start

Chance is flourishing being on the city swim team. He takes this endevour very seriously checking his times from previous swim meets and trying to improve. Yesterday during the meet here at our home pool, Chance was favored to win the freestyle based on times from the last meet. Chance was ready. And excited. The boys were all lined up in their lanes at the end of the pool waiting in anticipation for the buzzer to sound telling them it was time to start.
Except Chance who was waiting for the designated person to pull their arm down so he would know it was time to start seeing as how the buzzer could sound all night and day and Chance would still not know it was time to go.

The problem is, the person Chance was supposed to watch, was not standing in a good place for Chance to see them. In order to see their arm, Chance had to crane his neck at a weird angle and therefore was not be in a good position to start a competitive race. So, he came in 4th place. Which is still really good, but not where he wanted to be. Once he got off, he swam hard and made up time, just not enough to win.

Chance's dad decided that he would volunteer to be the person Chance watches next time as he will be much more aware of how important his location is to Chance's ability to start the race in good position and on time.

We'll have to be aware of this little glitch each time the hosting cities don't have the flashing light and rely on a person to tell Chance when it is time to go.

Self-advocating

One of the main topics they stress to you as a parent of a deaf child is to teach your child to advocate for themselves. They won't always have you with them and besides, they have to have the ability to go out into the world and do things like tell their teacher when they can't hear, or have someone repeat the instructions when they missed what was said.

We have tried to ensure that Chance is expected to be as independent in the same things his older brother was at his age..whatever age that may be at the time.

That self advocating came to the forefront today when I got a phone call from Chance.

Chance called me from a neighbors house to ask me if his two friends could come to his little brother's T-ball game so that they could all play tennis during the game at the tennis courts at the Junior High.

Apparently though, the details had not been worked out before he called me because he kept talking to friends and working things out while we were on the phone. This was OK, but I was surprised that Chance would carry on a discussion with me, two friends and all of the background noise that was coming from his friend's house where they have 4 young children that I could hear making noise. He usually does not appreciate lots of noise while he is on the phone and will sometimes hand the phone to me if he is talking to someone and there is too much background noise on either end of the line.

The talking went back and forth for a minute, with Chance asking me if he could invite his friends, then telling his friend to ask his mom, then asking me what time the game started, then having his friend tell his mom etc. etc.

Then, Chance yelled, "EVERYONE QUIET!" Then a little softer, he added,"I'm on the phone."

Wow. Chance told the neighbors to be quiet in their own house? I think he was talking to all of his friend's siblings and not his friend's parents. Chance is not that brave enough to tell parents to be quiet. That is a good thing:)

It is true that he has been playing at this neighbor's house since he was 3 years old and it is the home of his oldest friend. But should he yell at all of them to be quiet?

Perhaps I should have a little talk with Chance and tell him that he should limit yelling at people to be quiet when he is on the phone when he is at someone else's house:)

Or perhaps he could ask everyone BEFORE he makes the call to please be quiet so he can hear on the phone.

Chance self advocating is a good thing. Maybe we should focus a little on technique now:)

Singing with the girls....

Today in church, the kids played a game to help them learn the songs they will perform in the fall for the entire congregation.

Chance loves to sing and so when as part of the game, one of the songs was to be sung by "just the girls", Chance screwed up his face in frustration and signed to me as I was sitting behind him and over several seats,"I love this song! I want to sing!"

And then he did sing. With all of the girls in the room.

Of course this got some of the kids in the room laughing and pointing at Chance but he did not care and just sang on.

Chance's dad was up in the front of the room helping with a prop for the game and when his eyes caught mine, he nodded toward Chance and signed to me that Chance was singing. I could see that he was concerned that Chance had not heard that only the girls were to sing and now he was innocently singing along with the opposite sex.

I just smiled and half signed, half mouthed that Chance knew it time for just the girls to sing. He was just choosing to sing anyway.

As I watched Chance sing out undaunted by a few boys around him who were pointing and laughing at him, I thought how great it was that he didn't care about their reaction.

To me it showed that Chance is not self conscious about being different and does not feel the need to hide back in the shadows. He is deaf yes, but that does not define him. He was not worried that the other kids might think he didn't know only girls were singing. He didn't seem to care what they thought about him at all.
I hope he keeps this confidence forever and does not allow himself to be swayed by what others say.

The irony is, that the next step in the game, had only the boys sing the next verse. Chance looked back at me and with a big grin on his face, began to sing again. This time with the boys.

Chance is in the play

Chance's school put on the play, "1,000 cranes", based on the book. Chance got a part with quite a few lines and he was devoted to practicing to the point that one night when I told him he had to go to bed he complained,"You are not letting me practice for the play like I am supposed to!"

I am a brute that way.

Chance did a great job and had all of his lines completely memorized. He got a little nervous on stage (who doesn't), but he had those lines down pat and he did a great job. I found myself thinking,"None of these people would guess this is a deaf boy if they didn't see the implants. He is confident and he presents himself very well. We are so proud of this boy of ours!

You've got a friend in me

Chance has a good buddy that he has known since preschool. They are "two peas in a pod", a term both of them learned just this past week during their weekly speech session.

It just so happened that this friend ended up attending the same charter school this past year which both of them found most delightful.

Both boys wear implants...Chance has two, his friend has one. Chance is in fifth grade and his friend is in fourth grade. They were in the same grade until Chance bumped up a grade this past year and though Chance was happy to go up a grade, he really lamented the fact that he and his friend would now be in different grades.

Alas, the gods that be saw fit to place both of these boys at lunch during the same time and to allow them to spend afternoon recesses together. So it is only morning recess that they must be apart.

While talking to Chance's friend's mom about how cute they are together, she informed me that apparently a boy at school had been teasing and picking on her son. She then told me that Chance went up and set this boy straight, defending his friend, and now there does not seem to be a problem.

How great is that? Chance is nothing if not loyal and devoted.

So, don't mess with Chance's friends or you'll have to answer to Chance himself.

Chance gets his purple, orange and white belts

Chance has been playing the recorder in his music class at school. He really enjoys it and his teacher has come up with a fantstic idea to motivate the kids. They earn "belts" like you do in karate, and you get colored strings tied onto the end of the recorder each time you pass into the next level. Chance now has several lovely colored strings hanging off the end of his recorder of which he is very proud.

His teacher told me that the kids get up and play songs in class and then get a new string when they pass off the song. He said that Chance has been passing off several songs and that the kids in class sit and cheer him enthsiatically when he is done each time. He says it is really neat.

These are some of the same kids who laughed at Chance when he sang to try out for a solo part in the program.

I think these kids have now earned some redemption:)

I love teachers at school who make learning fun and intersting.

Now, if we can just get Chance to put on his implants BEFORE he practices the recorder in the morning, all will be right in the world.

Yes, he actually did that one morning...get up and practice his recorder with out putting on his implants.

What a spaz. But a cute spaz.