A Chance To Hear

Chance CAN hear himself think....(it's important that we know that)

2012-02-01T00:41:00.001-07:00

Chance got up Saturday morning and had some sort of altercation with his sister that left him sulky and distraught. He was obviously quite upset about something.

He was not eager to share what was wrong, not even when his dad sat him down to try and figure out his distress.

Chance's sister said she was sorry for whatever had upset him, but it not bring closure to Chance's worries.

We chalked it up to Chance being tired and thought he would loosen up as the day went on.
It became apparent however, that this was not going to pass and at the urging of his father, Chance came to me in the kitchen to tell me his troubles.

"She said I can't hear myself think!" he said starting to cry.
She of course being his sister.

"She said that?" I asked surprised she would come up with such a statement.

"NO!" Came his sisters voice from the piano. "I did not say that!"

"Yes!" Chance said emphatically."She said I can not hear myself!"

"Of course you can hear yourself." I said rubbing his back. "Everyone can hear themselves think no matter if you are deaf nor not."

"But she said I can not hear myself and so did Dad!"

Now this was starting to make sense. When Chance does not have his implants on, he can be loud and not know how loud he is. Apparently, he had taken the comment of, "You can't hear yourself" which has been said sometimes when his implants are off and he is louder than he realizes as an assault on his ability to hear himself.

"You can hear yourself right?" I asked.

Chance nodded slowly. "We all know that you can hear yourself in your own head. We all can hear ourselves. People may say,"You can not hear yourself when your implants are off and you are being louder than you think, but we all know that you can hear yourself think."

That seemed to help him and he could carry on.

How interesting that it would bother him so much when he thinks people are implying that he can not hear himself think.

Rapelling down the rock

2012-01-15T22:50:00.000-07:00

Over the Christmas break, we went down to see Chance's grandparents...they live south, which is always warmer than we are.

While we were there, we went to a park that is basically just giant red rocks, crevices, tunnels, and a crevice so narrow, that when you hike through it, you are wedged in between two giant rocks that tower up above you and enclose you. The man in front of me was claustrophobic and it was a slow go for him:)

One of the rocks was big enough that people were rapelling off of it. Chance was walking along the top of this rock taking great interest in the men rapelling down when they made him an offer he could not refuse.

If he brought his parents over and they gave permission, they would let him rapell down.

Chance has been talking about this experience for a few weeks now. He loved it.

I love that Chance has the ability to interact and communicate with people he just met . The implants allow him to just be like any other child. He can talk to anyone and he has the confidence to interact with people he does not know.

You wonder how your deaf child will interact with the world when you first discover they are deaf.
We are very pleased about how the interaction thing is going for Chance:)

You can't shelter them

2012-01-12T23:41:00.000-07:00

Chance is getting to a point where his friends want to go greater distances on their bikes etc. This is all a part of growing up and it is both gratifying to watch Chance grow bigger and also a little sad.

I do worry a little more about Chance than I did his brother though at this age when it comes to riding his bike and having to cross major roads.

Chance attends a charter school thus some of his friends live farther away than our little neighborhood. One friend wanted to ride to the local grocery store Macey's where the boys can get cheap ice cream cones and cheaper candy:) This is of course a great activity as far as young boys are concerned.

But the boys have to cross State Street with cars whizzing by at what seems like 150mph sometimes. There is a crosswalk and pedestrian lights and all, but it is still such a busy intersection.

My bit of angst comes from remembering the day I drove up behind Chance and honked and he didn't hear me. At all. Of course he had hearing aids then.

However, it is winter and Chance has both a hat that has flaps that cover his ears for warmth and a bike helmet. Not ideal hearing conditions. I don't know what his hearing is with all of those contraptions on. If a car decided to barrel through a red light, would Chance hear it coming as he crossed?

Perhaps if I hadn't witnessed psychotic drivers in my lifetime it would ease my worries.

Like the time I was driving up by a local university when a student started to cross the four lane road in the crosswalk. I stopped, but the driver behind me, while letting me know he was highly annoyed, had swerved around me into the other lane and barely missed the student when he slammed on his brakes. I thought I was going to witness a death that day.

Or the father of one of the families in our old neighborhood who would drive through way too fast, honking as he sailed through the neighborhood intersections so kids would get out of the way.

I think about these sort of things when my deaf son is up against a busy road where cars are whizzing by.

Then I remember the conference I attended seveeral years ago where a deaf man talked to us about letting our children do what any other kids their age do. You can't shelter them, he had said.

I don't want to shelter Chance, I actually want him to be able to branch out and experience life.

I just don't want him to get squished by a car.

Our own Christmas miracle

2012-01-05T23:47:00.000-07:00

On Christmas day, we attended our church for a service that included a few speakers and some beautiful musical numbers. It was an uplifting meeting and a wonderful way to start Christmas Day.

The speakers were wonderful.

The music was inspiring.

The deaf child, my deaf child, rising from our pew to sing with the choir was a miracle.

When Chance was first diagnosed as being deaf, everyone was so leary to give us specifics on what he would be able to do. I understand that, but I really wanted to know if he would be able to enjoy music. Would music just be something he never knew the pleasure of hearing? Would his experience with it only be a thumping on the floor which he would feel through vibrations?

Chance had been the only member of the family able to attend choir practice and so it was that when they called up the choir, Chance alone rose from our pew and headed up to the stand. He stood confidently next to a brother who shared music with him.

At first, Chance looked around like he was assessing what exactly was going on. The songs prepared for Christmas were more intricate, more challenging. There were arrangements of several songs strung together and harmonies and solo parts. Chance had not been able to attend every practice and had in fact pleaded with me to be able to attend practice when he realized a few weeks earlier that choir was in session after church.

Soon though, Chance was reading the music, singing out with confidence, and by the end he was holding the music and turning the pages when it was time for himself and the two others sharing his music sheets.

It truly sounded as if the choir was accented by angels who joined in praise. Along with the deaf boy whose voice helped uplift a congregation.

2011-12-20T11:01:00.001-07:00

I am sitting here at the desk listening intently to a Collin Raye song. Chance is standing here next to me with a questioning look on his face waiting for me to reveal what the lyrics are saying in a few spots of the song.
You see Chance loves Collin Raye and is listening to one of his CD's while he does his job of cleaning the kitchen table and mopping the floor.
Chance thought he heard the word freez'in and wants to know what that word means. This word is not to be confused with the word freezing as Chance is emphatic that freezing is not the word used in the song. It is doubtful freezing is the word used since it is a love song.
Ahh Hahhh! The word in question is "prison". Collin Raye says prison.
I have been singing the lyrics as Chance closely watches my face. I think we've answered the questions for this morning. At least for this particular song:)

Take your ears off

2011-12-08T11:55:00.004-07:00

We were driving in the van into the dark of night when Chance's brother mentioned that someone has been making fun of him and mocking him in front of some of the other boys . It was someone that we all knew, and I feel that when my kids are talking to me about other people, it is on a sort of need to know basis. Unless it affects them, I feel we should try to have respect for all of the parties involved which means not sharing information all round. This helps keep harmonious relationships with people around us and makes sure that an ant hill is not blown into a mountain.

So I jokingly told Chance to turn off his ears while we turned onto the road.

A few minutes later Chance asked," Can I put my implants back on now?"

What an obedient boy! The magnets of the implants lay limply by his head and his sweet face was turned to me with that simple question of,"Can I put my implants back on now?"

Now, if only all of the family had this ability, imagine how easily Christmas surprises could be discussed:)

Chance's watch

2011-12-05T23:47:00.000-07:00

Chance has a watch that he wears most all of the time. He is conscientious about time and tries to make sure he is on time to scouts etc. which is a good thing.
However, for some inconceivable reason, the alarm goes off on this watch at odd times sometimes. It just starts beeping. This is all well and good if you are deaf and it goes off in the middle of the night.
However, when you have perfectly normal hearing and an alarm goes off at 1:00 a.m., you notice.
Chance fell asleep curled up by the fire on our bedroom floor. He looked so snugly we just left him there for the night.
Then the alarm went off in the early morning hours. Chance slept blissfully on while his dad and I lay in bed trying to figure out first of all what the noise was, and then wondering when the noise would end.
The alarm usually doesn't last long, just long enough to wake you up when you hear it.
Unless you are Chance of course. In which case, the alarm going off has no affect on you and is thus useless:)

Writing class

2011-11-27T22:35:00.004-07:00

Chance's writing class is broken up into 3 groups: One group reads a book such as "Tom Sawyer", one is a poetry group where the kids read, write and analyze poetry and to be honest, I am not sure what the third group does.

Chance is in the poetry group. I noticed last week that he kept asking me what words meant as he did his homework and then it dawned on me that it was taking quite a while for Chance to get his homework done which is not characteristic of him.

Some of the poetry used words in ways that no one would ever use in normal conversations. Or writing for that matter.

Other poems had words that were not used often or old fashioned.

It occurred to me that Chance may be struggling with the vocabulary of these poems and when I asked him if he had to figure out what many of the words meant before he finished the assignment he said yes.

Then the last day of school before Thanksgiving break, when I thought all of his homework was done, Chance informed me that he had not gotten two poems finished for his poetry unit which was due that day.

Chance is very conscientious about getting his homework done on time and when I asked him why he did not have the two poems ready to turn in, he told me that he had done all of the others, these were the last two and he had done his best.

I asked him if the words in the poems made it hard for him to finish getting them done and he told me yes.

So I went in and talked to the teacher. I told her that some of the vocabulary made it hard for Chance to get through all of the assignments as he had to figure out what so many of the words meant before he could do the assignments and asked if I could work with Chance over the Thanksgiving break and get the last two poems done. She was very understanding and said that would be alright. I want Chance to do all that he is capable of and rarely do I feel that he needs special time lines to turn in assignments, but when I realized just how much the vocabulary was affecting his ability to get the work done, I felt it was only fair to allow him more time to complete the assignment. Chance is pulled out of the last bit of writing for speech once a week as well, so sometimes he misses what the teacher explains during that time.

Now the night before school starts back up again, Chance is done with his last two poems. We had a discussion as to what "analyze this poem meant" and what logical and nonsensical meant as he was supposed to pick out examples of nonsensical and logical verses from a poem they had done in class.

Just little things that amount to a lot when you are trying to get through a poem. Chance actually did most of the assignments with out my help. Most of the difficult vocabulary was in the assignments that he already turned in before the break and once we sat down and talked about what certain words meant so he understood what he was expected to do he was fine.

The last assignment involved Chance writing a poem about some of his ancestors so we hauled out the book I have filled with stories of some of our ancestors. Chance read through them and then decided to write about his great great grandma using activities she did in nature as his theme. He talked about how she loved to play outside as a girl and picked giant mushrooms to sell during the great depression from fields by her house. It was quite a good poem and I think Chance got to know his great great grandmother a little better as well.

Vocabulary will be something that I think we need to stay attuned to for the rest of Chance's school career. Chance is smart and catches on very fast, but all it takes is missing what a few words mean to blow your ability to understand what is being talked about.

As Chance gets older, the vocabulary will get more intense. I know he can do it. We just have to make sure that he gets the vocabulary ground work laid so he doesn't get frustrated.

The audiologist Carol Flexer talked about the importance of vocabulary and deaf kids when she came and gave a conference last spring. She actually said that if a deaf or hard of hearing child starts to struggle in a subject, especially one that has not been a problem before, to not assume that it was the child, but to look at the vocabulary and see if that is the problem.

One of those annoying cell phone people in Costco

2011-11-14T10:23:00.005-07:00

I was one of those annoying cell phone people in the store Costco on Saturday. You know the ones, where you can hear their conversation across the store.

I didn't mean to be. I usually like to be quiet and unnoticed when I get a call on the phone. I figure everyone is not as interested in what my kids are doing as I am.

I can only blame Chance for my practical announcement to all of Costco that I was on my way home and that I would have Chance's birth certificate to the soccer game before it started so that he could play.

It all started when I left to the store and planned to just meet Chance at his soccer game. I had arranged with Chance's friend and fellow soccer player's family for Chance to ride with them.
As I shopped however, I got a phone call from a distraught Chance. Apparently, people cheat in this world and try to let their older kids play on younger kids soccer teams to better their chances of winning. At age 11? Really? Anyway, due to this dishonesty, Chance was not going to be able to play in the soccer game until I showed up with his birth certificate and proved that he was indeed 11 years old. Only I didn't realize this fact until I got the worried phone call from Chance.

When Chance called, I could hear the television in the back ground at an abnormally high volume plus his siblings were playing and making noise.

So, my conversation with Chance went something like this:

Chance :"Hello mom? Where are you?"

Me trying to be quiet and polite in the aisle"I am at the store."

Chance:"What?"

Me:"I'm at the store."

Chance:"What? I can't hear you!"

Me:"I AM AT THE STORE."

It should be noted that talking louder does not always mean Chance can actually hear me better. Sometimes it just muffles the sound more but this time, he kept asking me to talk louder.

Chance:"When will you be home? "

Me:"In just a little bit, Cade's family is giving you a ride to the game, remember?"

Chance:"What? I can't hear you!"

Me:"YOU ARE GETTING A RIDE WITH CADE TO THE GAME!"

Chance:"I know but I have to have my birth certificate or they won't let me play!"

Me:"Ok, I'll bring your birth certificate to the building before the game so you can play."

Chance:"What did you say?'

Me:"I'LL GET TO THE GAME WITH THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE BEFORE IT STARTS SO THAT YOU CAN PLAY!"

Chance:"O.K. bye."

I think everyone who was with in 3 rows of me at Costco heard that I would be bringing Chance's birth certificate to the soccer game before it started. I'm sure that put them all at ease:)

We may have to actually break down and get phones that text. Chance does not have a cell phone at the moment and Chance's dad and I can text on our phones but we pay for each and every text - so we turned off texting capabilities. Each time we have had texting turned on, we get slammed with ads. We end up paying for people to tell us about a three bedroom house that is for sale in our area. Or that we just won a cruise if we just call the 1-800 number. We pay more for people to advertise to us than we do actual texting from people we want to hear from.

But the time may have come to get a new phone plan and get texting so that Chance can text us when he is not hearing well on a telephone. (Of course, that also means providing Chance the ability to send & receive the texts - meaning getting Chance a phone) And then all of the people at Costco can shop in peace without hearing the drama that goes into playing soccer:)

Writing class

2011-11-06T22:57:00.003-07:00

When I walked into Chance's writing class to help out, I was a little late. I peeped through the window in the classroom door and found Chance sitting at a table with a friend.

I made my way over to him and noticed that several of Chance's classmates were telling Chance that I had arrived, yet he didn't really respond or look up.

That was O.K., I figured he was just really immersed in whatever he was doing. And he was really immersed.

While the rest of the class hummed with the sounds of kids memorizing a poem, Chance sat calmly focused looking at his computer.

He finally saw me when I sat down next to him and then signed to me that his implants were turned off.

I nodded in acknowledgement realizing that was why he did not respond to the kids telling him I had arrived, and set my purse down.

Then it hit me that Chance had just told me that his implants were off while he was sitting in class.

I tapped him and asked him why.

He said that he could focus better on the poem he was supposed to memorize. And focus he did. Chance sat totally unperturbed by the girls at the next table over who were making up a hand slapping rhythm to memorize the poem.

In fact, the entire room had a low buzzing quality to it as a classroom full of kids repeated the verses and sometimes worked with a friend next to them.

Chance had a friend next to him too, who just kind of looked at Chance every so often. It's not like he could talk to him or ask him a question. He seemed just to understand that and sat alternating between looking at his own computer and checking out what the other kids in the class were doing.

Later when Chance got home from school, he informed me that he had gotten his poem all the way memorized.

I congratulated him and could not help but think that being able to turn off the rest of the class had major benefits sometimes.

I did tell Chance that he might want to let his teacher know when he removed the processor off of the magnets to let them dangle in unhearing bliss. Just so the teacher would know that if he did say something of importance, Chance was blissfully unaware:)

Caught in the act

2011-10-31T22:56:00.005-06:00

Chance is doing very well. His speech is very good too and sometimes it is hard for people to know what he may need to be working on if they are not familiar with deaf children and don't know the specifics.

The speech therapist at the school is covering for the speech therapist that worked with Chance last year while she is on some sort of hiatus. I've heard that she will be back at the beginning of the new year or thereabouts. In the meantime, the speech therapist told me that Chance is doing very well and she was wondering what she should be working with him on. I don't know if the communication between the regular speech therapist and the one covering was very thorough, but it doesn't seem like the new therapist knows much about what Chance had been working on.

The speech therapist seems like a great lady and is very nice and I told her that I would give her some examples of where Chance needs some aid. Chance will say things sometimes in a way that shows he does not fully grasp how language should flow together. It is not horribly bad, but it is stuff that needs to be addressed. The older Chance gets, the more that will be expected of him and it will be assumed that he knows certain things about the way our language flows.

I forgot to bring a sample of some of Chance's language that could be worked on when I went to the school to help out this past week, so while Chance was having a down time reading, I took his laptop and began to go through some of his writing assignments. I knew that I had seen some language glitches while reading through some of his work.

The class was silent since the students were reading, and apparently I was so engrossed in writing down samples of language from Chance's work to give to the therapist, that I missed the fact that the teacher had told the class to pull up something on their computers. Chance came to me to get his computer and then into the silence of the room asked quite loudly,"What are you doing?!" The whole class looked at us.

My first thought was,"Um.........."

What was I supposed to say while the entire class was listening, "Chance I am picking out mistakes in your language in some of the papers you have written so that your speech teacher who will come to collect you in a few minutes for speech, knows what to work on with you? I'm picking our your language mistakes honey!"

Thankfully, after Chance's initial loud question of,"What are you doing?" he was more concerned with looking up on the computer what his teacher was telling him to.

Shortly thereafter, the speech therapist did come for Chance and while Chance ran to the bathroom, I went over the language issues I had pulled out of Chance's writing.

One of the examples that I gave to the speech therapist was this sentence out of Chance's writing: "Do you want more time to trick or treat? Well, I have some good reasons to tell you." Chance will be in junior high next year and it will be assumed that he has a grasp on the language to a certain degree. And he does have a good grasp on the language in a lot of ways, but sometimes I see things like this that he has written and it becomes clear that we need to work some on getting the language in his head ontothe paper a little better. Chance is a good writer, he just needs to fine tune some things.

The speech therapist said it was very helpful and gave her an idea of where she could be working with Chance.

Chance has never asked me what I was doing again and seems to have forgotten the matter.
We have Chance's IEP this week, so having examples of speech mistakes should help the speech therapist come up with ideas of goals that she can work on with Chance.

It all seems to have ended well:)

Say it with song..

2011-10-24T00:04:00.004-06:00

Chance and his brother have chorus together at school. They are having their first concert of the year this coming week.

Last week, Chance's brother missed two days of school which left Chance to sing solo. (OK, there were all of the other kids in the chorus class singing along with him, but his brother was not there).

After school Chance proudly annonced to me that during class that day his chorus teacher had told the class that the only one singing loud enough was his friend Chance. Chance told me that he and his brother usually are the ones that sing out like their teacher wants the boys to.
My boys like to sing. This is good. The key is to keep them interested in singing through that award stage when many of the boys their age are declaring that singing is for sissies.
Chance's brother held on last year when several of the boys in the class transfered out of chorus as soon as they could since they said,"My mom made me take this class."

Chance and his brother really like singing together in class and it is fun to hear little snippets of songs escaping their lips that I had no idea they knew. Such as "Earth Angel."

Exposure to songs and learning to sing is fabulous for Chance and he really enjoys it. I hope he has a love for singing forever.

I think junior high will be when we face the biggest opposition. But his brother has held strong, bucking the trend of boys fleeing chorus. Chance can do it to:)

It's all about the rhythm

2011-10-16T22:40:00.006-06:00

I help out in Chance's school a few times a month and this week as I sat in reading, an interesting question was posed to me.

The class was going over poetry and the rhythms of different verse. The kids were listening to dicern where the emphasis is in poems and which syllable gets the accent.

The teacher came to me and asked how well Chance could hear the differences in the slight variations in the poems.

That was a good question. I told her that Chance actually hears really well and she said that when she had asked him which syllable gets the accent in a line of "Twas the Night Before Christmas", he got it right.

I have not thought of this before. For me, the little rhyming sing-song cadence of "Twas the Night Before Christmas", has just been a part of life since childhood. It seems I have always known that poem and its sing-song rhythm.

But what about for Chance? He wasn't hearing the subtle differences when he was little so I wonder how this poem plays out in his brain?

His little brother can already recite much of this little Christmas classic simply because of the sing-song verses and the rhyming.

Chance seems to be getting the accenting and metering fine, but I don't know that he has the same little ditty that plays through his head as many of us do when he recites this classic poem.
Also, how does he hear the subtle differences in poetry? Does he catch all of the ups and downs in verse?

Now I will have to test this out and see. I want to see if he hears and appreciates the little subtle changes in verse especially when they don't rhyme.

Sometimes... It is Not OK!

2011-10-09T19:01:00.011-06:00

Rarely in Chance's sojourn as a deaf child have I felt the need to put an adult in their place due to how they treated my son. We have been blessed to have mostly positive experiences and few outright persecutions due to Chance's deafness.

This week was an unfortunate week where Chance's inability to hear brought an unacceptable response from an adult at the school.

When Chance was first diagnosed as being deaf, I remember telling his dad that I could understand children saying things about his hearing aids or even making fun some as kids do when kids are different than them, but I would have no patience with adults who were mean to him due to his deafness. I feel adults should know better than to taunt a deaf child or any child who has a disability. And they should have more of an understanding as well.

This week at school however, an adult exhibited less than stellar behavior when interacting with Chance.

During school lunch, apparently some of the kids left their trays sitting on the table and did not clear them. To take care of this problem, a staff member at the school (not a teacher or principle) went out to find every 6th, 7th and 8th grade child to come to the lunchroom to help clean up since no one would fess up to leaving their trays.

Chance was upstairs in a little alcove at the top of the stairs that looks down on the lunchroom. Chance was sitting by a friend and suddenly his friend stood up and ran down the stairs. Chance said he thought, "I wonder why he got up and left so fast?" Soon, Chance found out as the staff member came to where Chance was and just yelled that he had to come down.

Chance said,"I was the only one there mom."

I asked Chance if he heard the man yelling before, and he said that he could hear that someone was yelling somewhere but he could not understand what they were saying.

Chance started scrambling to pack up his laptop and backpack as the man yelled out at the only child there which was Chance.

This staff member is loud to begin with. I have heard him at the school during lunch keeping the kids in line as they eat lunch. He has a very LOUD voice and it carries all the way down the hall. Plus, this man is a big man. The combination can be very intimidating to kids in normal circumstances I am sure.

The thought of this big loud man bellowing at my deaf son because he did not hear him calling the kids to the lunchroom, did not go over well with me.

Thankfully, Chance does not seem to have taken the situation personally.

My older son told me that this staff member was angry and was yelling at all of the older kids to come. My older son was outside eating lunch and heard yelling but by the time he got back inside, the incident appeared to be over. It was not, however, as the staff member then insisted that all of the older grades appear in the lunchroom the next day during lunch to clean during their lunch break. All of this because a few of the kids did not clear their trays. My boys bring lunch from home and don't even use the school trays so yelling at Chance because someone did not clear their tray was pointless to begin with. Chance is not a child that requires one to yell anyway. He is usually quite compliant and tries to adhere by the rules. He does not need harsh treatment to comply. I am told all the time by his teachers in school things like,"I wish all of my students were like Chance," and "He is no trouble at all."

I headed back up to the school to see the principle right after school and one of the things I told him was,"Someone yelling my son because he did not hear is not OK."

The principle told me that I had taken him off guard as he did not know about the situation but that he would email me when he checked it out. I have not heard back from him yet, though if he does not contact me by tomorrow, I will call him back.

I understand that there are a lot of kids to keep under control at the school, but this situation seems to have gotten out of hand. A man who will yell at a deaf child is a man who is out of control. He should have been able to realize that Chance was the only one in the room and may not have heard rather than go off on him. I think he should have been able to contain himself with all of the kids. Yelling and screaming at kids like that over left over trays is not a proper response from an adult with kids who have normal hearing let as well yelling at a deaf child who does not grasp what is going on. Was all of this yelling worth it? Was it effective? I don't think so. I think it just scared the kids spitless. This seems to have been more about control than moving towards a solution.

I am not one who regularly goes to the principle's office but I felt that this situation could not just be let go. Meanwhile, I am waiting to see what the principle says.

The importance of friends

2011-10-02T23:34:00.000-06:00

When Carol Flexer gave a presentation in Salt Lake City she spent all day giving us great information to help the deaf children in our lives. As I listened throughout the day about helping these kids and helping them learn to self-advocate, something occurred to me: The advantage of having a few good friends that you feel comfortable asking questions. If you have a friend that you feel you can turn to and say,"What did she just say?" It could make all of the difference.
I began to wonder if as kids get older they actually are less inclined to ask questions when they miss what was said.

I think of myself in situations where I am in a group of people and miss something that was said. If everyone around me starts doing a task and they all seem to know just what to do, I usually won't ask right away what we are doing. I will sit back and observe everyone for a minute to see if I can figure out what I missed. When everyone around you seems to be in the know but you, sometimes you feel a little sheepish because they all got it and you didn't.

I can see how our deaf kids would just see if they could figure out what was going on instead of asking about what they missed especially as they get older.

I brought this topic up as I ate lunch with my deaf and hard of hearing friend and they readily agreed that there were times when they tried to figure out what was going on around them by observing those around them rather than ask questions as everyone else seemed to know what was going on. Especially in high school.


Chance with some friends at the Hogle Zoo

I thought of Chance's neighborhood friend that is in his class at church. I have seen Chance turn to him to clarify that he heard something right. He is comfortable doing that with this friend and so he does. I wonder if he would be as willing to ask if he was sitting by someone who was not a friend or someone that he didn't know well. Hmmmm.

I can see the advantage of being with people you feel comfortable enough to clarify things with or ask questions to when you are a deaf child.

I have seen Chance freely ask his friends in the neighborhood to clarify things and he will ask us in the family when he doesn't quite get what was said, but if he was sitting by a child he didn't know real well at school? I don't know that Chance would bother asking.

I think he would ask if the situation got desperate enough. Like if the room went silent and everyone was typing steadily on their computers and Chance didn't know what in the world they were supposed to be typing. I don't see Chance sitting and doing nothing instead of asking someone what they are supposed to be doing because it is important to him to do well in school and finish his assignments. But I do wonder if Chance would ask every time he needs to in various situations when he misses what was said. It is something to think and talk about with him to help him learn that part of self-advocating is asking questions even when he may not be completely comfortable, so that he knows what is going on.

Carol Flexer and vocabulary

2011-09-25T23:22:00.000-06:00

Carol Flexer came out to Salt Lake City and spoke to parents, teachers, and those who work with deaf and hard of hearing children. She is an audiologist and quite amazing. I always learn something to use with Chance when I listen to her and I appreciate her knowledge.

It was after hearing Carol Flexer talk about how we should expect our deaf children to hear from 30 feet more than 6 years ago that got us seriously thinking about getting Chance a cochlear implant again.
My husband and I looked at each other and mouthed,"THIRTY FEET?"
We realized that we could have expectations like that with Chance's hearing.

When Carol came this last spring, she talked about many things that struck me and made me think. One thing she talked about was when a deaf child starts struggling in school when there was no problem before, don't immediately decide that it is the child. Look at the vocabulary and the terminology first. Many a deaf child has struggled due to the fact that they did not hear or understand the vocabulary or terminology, not that they could not get the concept. And the terms get more difficult as they get older.

This is a concept that I remember focusing on when Chance was younger, but I think I need to make sure that he is getting the terminology now.

Imagine how lost you could get if you just missed what eruption meant when doing a unit on volcanos in science. The teacher would start talking about the different signs that a volcano may present before it erupts and you would be trying to figure out what in the world she was talking about.

Or what if you missed what the word sum meant in math. The teacher would be up there telling you to figure out the sum and you would be a lost little puppy.

I went out to lunch with two deaf adults in the break during Carol's conference and it was so enlightening to learn from them. The gentleman had been one of Chance's consultants when he was in 2nd grade and wears hearing aids. The woman is a friend of mine who has bilateral implants.

I saw how when a baby started to cry a few tables over they both leaned in to hear better. I heard the baby but my hearing was not hampered by the noise.

I also learned from Chance's consultant that he has seen how vocabulary issues has side-tracked kids that otherwise are doing great in school. Once they understand the vocaulary they are good to go.

I know that Chance has some holes in his vocabulary. He went two years without hearing plus several years not hearing all that he needed to so every once in a while a word will come up that other kids his age will know the meaning of but Chance does not. He did not hear the word the 500 plus times they say a child needs to hear a word to "own it" from the ages of 1 to 6 like most of his peers. Plus, these deaf kids hear amazingly well but they do not hear absolutely everything.

I have requested that Chance's science teacher send me the vocabulary and terminology for their units as much of it is going to be stuff Chance has not heard before. I think it will do a lot of good to get the terminology and go over it with him to make sure he gets the meaning of the concepts at least the vocabulary involved. That will help ensure that he is on an equal footing with his peers when his teacher starts throwing around new terms that Chance has never heard before in his life.

Chance is the one they look up to now

2011-09-14T12:45:00.009-06:00

Years ago, our family attended an A.G.Bell ice cream social in a park right after Chance was diagnosed.

We were a little like wanderers in a confusing universe. Our universe consisted of having an almost 3 year old diagnosed as being deaf and now we were trying to figure out what to do about it.

What tests did he need to determine the cause?

What doctor should we be seeing next?

How much was Chance hearing with his hearing aids anyway?

And perhaps the question that was topmost in our minds:"What was the best thing for Chance and what should we be doing about that?"

We ambled over to the pavilion and watched strangers with children with hearing loss. We were actually more interested in the children with hearing loss than with their parents at the moment.

Were the deaf kids really hearing?

Could they understand what was said to them?

Did they look happy?

How were the older ones, like 11, 12, and teen-agers? Were they talking? Could you understand them when they talked? What were they doing in school? Did they need all kinds of special help when they got to be that age? Were they integrated with their peers and not left out of everything?

Last night, 8 years after that first ice cream social in the park, Chance was the one being watched by parents with young children and babies with hearing loss. I introduced myself to a few parents and after briefing each other on our children's hearing loss situation, they would want to know where Chance was.

I would find him playing football, playing in the jumpy house or just goofing around with friends and call him over.

I would show him the little baby with teeny hearing aids and he would think they were cute. Then the parents would ask Chance a few questions:
How old was he?
What grade in school?
Did he like his implants?

He would smile and nod his sun-bleached head as he answered their questions.

Chance on recent campout with his Dad and brother

Chance represents the possibilities now. He is the bigger kid who talks, goes to a regular school and plays on the city league sports teams. He is completely capable and able to do whatever he wants to do.

The journey was not always easy and there were a lot of things we just didn't know. Our journey was a little different because Chance was diagnosed later and therefore we were playing catch up and none of the professionals dared to give us too much hope since no one had any idea what Chance would be able to do. It had not been established if the hearing loss was progressive. We did not know if there were other medical issues that accompanied the deafness. Chance had a lot of make-up time in language. He was well behind his peers his age and he had had no hearing input or any other language input for two years. No one quite knew what would happen with Chance.

Miracles occurred, that is what happened. Bonafide God-given miracles. Lots of prayer, years of effort, hard work, frustration, the unknown and never giving up have come to fruition. The results are in and the scores are awesome!

The possibilities for these deaf and hard of hearing children are amazing.

I hope some of those parents left the ice cream social a little more confident in their ability to carry on and realizing that the future for their deaf and hard of hearing children is bright. They will be able to do what ever they set their minds to. And those wonderful parents are just the ones to help their children on this incredible journey!~

Karaoke

2011-09-11T23:52:00.000-06:00

Karaoke moments elicit fear into the hearts of many a person. There seem to be two types of people...those who get up and have a good time singing karaoke, and those who given the choice would rather take their chances swimming with a shark.

Our church congregation had a party up the canyon by our house with a picnic and karaoke singing. A red book was passed around with all of the possible songs one could sing in front of friends and neighbors.

As the night wore on and Chance listened to more and more people get up and sing, he and his sister decided that they would like to give it a go. So they found a song that they knew called,"Hey There Delilah" and up they went in the mountain air to sing their song.

Chance did not know all of the words to the song and instead was relying on the scrolling screen in front of him that displayed the lyrics to fill in the gaps.

At first he just sort of looked down at the screen trying to make sure he didn't miss any of the words like his sister. He did a good j0b singing all of the words and soon the two of them began to loosen up.

After he was done, he was so proud of himself and he told me," Mom! At first when I got up I was nervous and was just trying to sing all of the words, but by the end of the song I wanted to sing all of the songs in the book!"

Ahhh the confidence of youth. Maybe it was the mountain air, but whatever it was, I hope Chance retains this confidence forever.

Chance tells the state school board about his great teachers

2011-09-04T23:02:00.003-06:00

A few months ago the state of Utah had a series of meetings to determine what should be done with the School for the Deaf and Blind. In a nutshell, due to the passionate views on the debate on whether deaf children should learn to talk or use sign language, the states school board of education had been hearing many complaints about the education of deaf children. People were unhappy that their particular choice was not being honored the way they thought it should through funding etc. And frankly, the school board had heard enough complaining that they were wondering if the School for the Deaf and Blind should even exist anymore. They felt that perhaps the services provided by the school should be transferred to the various school districts in the state. Bad, bad, bad idea!!

Some people just don't understand the education of deaf children. I of course come from the listening and spoken language route, having a child with bilateral implants. What is done for these kids in the early years makes all of the difference in their later years of life. In my opinion, few investments offer such a huge pay off for the state in the long run as that of giving young deaf children the services they need when they are young.
Take Chance for instance. Chance is thriving and is completely capable to compete with his hearing peers in school, sports, scouts etc. He got what he needed when he was young and now it is paying great dividends.
Since Chance has been so blessed by the services offered through the School for the Deaf through the years, he accompanied me and his father to testify before the state school board of the importance of the services that are provided by the school. Passing these services off to local school districts would be a tragedy for deaf kids and I am not exaggerating in saying that. The teachers and professionals at the School for the Deaf are trained to work with deaf kids and give them what they need so they get what they need to reach their potential.

Special education teachers along with school speech therapists would try to give what was needed but frankly they just don;t have the training to give these deaf kids what they need.

Thankfully, the state school board has not dissovled the School for the Deaf as of yet, and hopefully, they never do. The school is vital for our deaf children to get what services they need and we have a great spoken language program with superb teachers and professionals who are dedicated to these kids.

Long live the School for the Deaf!

Here is Chance's speech to the state school board of education: (it is a bit choppy sorry about that - no image-stabilizer, and volume in room was low... )

Discussions on a Long Drive...

2011-08-28T23:40:00.000-06:00

Ohhhh the beauty of long car rides with the family. So many memories are made along with interesting occurrences that you can all talk about forever.

On the Road Again... Just Can't Wait to Get on the Road Again...

Our family recently got back from such a trip. We drove across the country until we found ourselves in the state of Illinois. That is several states away from us and required three long days of driving EACH WAY. That is a total of 6 days of blissful travel in case you are counting. The days in the car really weren't that bad. We tried to visit interesting sights along the way and we all made memories to last a life time.

One such memory came about due to a movie the kids were talking about called,"The Best Two Years". The movie takes place in The Netherlands and has a joke about someone asking for sliced bread. Only instead of asking for sliced bread, the man asks for circumcised bread since the two words sound awfully alike in Dutch.


Chance and his brother at Winter Quarters Historic Site

Chance's older brother asked about the joke and we told him what it meant. He blushed a little and then said,"Oh, so that is why they are all laughing!"

Chance did not hear our explanation of the joke since he was in the back of the car and there was lots of extra noise at the time.

So, we told Chance's brother who was sitting in the middle seat to tell Chance what the joke was about.

His brothers eyes got big and he said something like,"What? I don't want to have to explain it to him! That's embarrassing!"

We made him do it anyway. Chance could not hear us, not when trying to tell him details like a joke.

A light went on in Chance's eyes as he got the joke and he laughed.

You just never know what you might learn about while on a cross country road trip with the family.

Our one and only day of balcony seating

2011-08-14T23:48:00.005-06:00

Today we attended church in a beautiful building called a tabernacle. It is an older building built in 1909. There have been some improvements since then of course, such as indoor plumbing which I am a BIG fan of:)

The building has charm and little touches of elegance that they used to build into such buildings back in the day. We attend church here about every 6 months as it a time when several wards meet together so a larger venue is needed.

A note as to what a ward and stake are:
A ward is a group of church members that live with in a specified radius and meet together to worship each week. A ward usually consists of roughly 300 people and is presided over by a bishop who cares for and looks after the people in his ward. A stake is a group of about 7 wards and typically consists of about 2,000 people with a stake president presiding over the 7 wards. These numbers can vary depending on where in the world you are located. These wards and stakes can be found all over the world in many different counties using many different languages. About every 6 months, a stake meets together to receive instruction from the stake president and his counselors. This merits the need for a bigger meeting place and so we use the tabernacle in our area.

In years past, we have sat in the basement area where we are close to the bathrooms and where we watch the proceedings on a television. This area is great for families with young children as there is a hallway outside where you can let the little ones stretch their legs after sitting for a while and there are bathrooms close by. The meeting lasts about 2 hours so there is a need to stretch ones legs when you are a little kid:) Plus, if we are honest with ourselves, we know that sometimes we have sat in the basement because we have not arrived early enough to get another seat in the chapel. Mostly though, we sit in the basement because it is best for young kids:)

Today, we decided to graduate to the balcony of the old building. We had a sweeping view of the stage and the chapel below. We could see in detail the beautiful decorative work along the ceilings and railings. It was a great place to be to be spiritually fed.

As the first speaker got under way however, I found that I had to focus in order to hear him. Then I thought of Chance and wondered what he was hearing. I leaned over and asked him,"Chance, can you hear?" He despondently answered,"I can't hear anything." (which would help explain why he kept having issues with his sister. When one can't hear, one has time to focus on other things and can be more irritated by little sisters...who it should be mentioned was not an innocent victim in this scenario)

Beautiful old building, with minimal acoustic stability.

There was still an hour and 35 minutes left in the meeting which was much too long for Chance to be expected to just sit not hearing. So, I began to check out the seats below from our balcony view to see if there was another place closer to the podium so Chance could hear. As luck would have it, there were a few seats on pews off to the side of the stage where a television screen had been set up so you could see the speaker.

We could not take the entire family up to the new seats(OK, maybe we could have but we were not ready to take several young children up to the front of the chapel where they could be seen by everyone and where there was not room to stretch little legs and noise made would be heard through out the chapel). Thankfully, other families seemed to feel the same way so there were some seats still available in this area.

In a tender and loving gesture, Chance's brother who it should be noted is always there for his brother, volunteered to go sit up on the side of the stage with Chance so he could hear. I escorted the boys down the stairs and waited at the back of the room while they made their way up to the seats on the side of the stage. I then waited for the signal that told me if Chance could hear there.......an intricate system that required the boys to give me a thumbs up or down.

The boys flashed a thumbs up sign and then I headed back up to the balcony seat. I could see the boys from up there and they sat so reverently down there together it did my heart proud.

At the dinner table at home, we discussed what was talked about at stake conference and Chance was able to tell us what he had learned since he could actually hear after the move.

We have now learned that when we next attend church in the tabernacle, our family needs to get there extra early so we can sit in the chapel down by the podium so that Chance can hear. Or stick to our seats in the basement. The balcony is a beautiful place to sit, but Chance is more than worth it so we can give up the lofty seating from here on out:)

Under the bed

2011-08-12T18:01:00.007-06:00

"I hate it when my implant falls off of my bed and lands under my bed during the night. Especially since under my bed is a wild wilderness of stuff."
This is the thought that I imagine Chance had when he realized that is implant had fallen under his bed after he fell asleep.
How is this for natural consequence parenting?
Clean under your bed, you'll find your implant!
Chance has not appreciated only having one implant today, yet he has realized that in order to find the other one, he must search under the bed.......in depth.
Ahhh, the natural laws of the universe at work:)
The thing is, I know he will clean at least some of it because he can not stand only having one implant for very long.

Disclaimer: Chance shares a bedroom with his brother and each of them claim the stuff under the bed belongs to the other one and should therefore be cleaned by the owner.
So, until the items under the bed are unearthed, we won't know if Chance is to be blamed for the mess or not.
The plot thickens.

Chance can't hear the cheers, but we yell encouragement anyway

2011-07-23T22:18:00.000-06:00

Funny thing about Chance being on the swim team. Even though he can't hear us cheer, we cheer him on just as loud as we do his brother. It just seems wrong to cheer enthusiastically for his brother and then stand silently by as Chance swims. We adore both of them and want them both to know that they have fans in the stands!
I think Chance can feel our vibes of encouragement even if he doesn't hear us yelling out his name or telling him things like,"Come on, bring her on home!"

I wonder what it is like to swim with out hearing all of the voices and noise bouncing around? Sometimes those swimming event places are just plain loud. For other swimmers the noise is part of the race.
Chance's race is blissfully quiet. Or is it blissful? He doesn't know any different and it seems that you could concentrate on your strokes with out having to wonder,"What did I just hear? Did they say Dan was winning?"

Hmmmmm. To be a part of Chance's world for a minute would be really interesting.
In the mean time, we continue to give a shout out,"Go Chance!"

The missed start

2011-07-21T09:19:00.003-06:00

Chance is flourishing being on the city swim team. He takes this endevour very seriously checking his times from previous swim meets and trying to improve. Yesterday during the meet here at our home pool, Chance was favored to win the freestyle based on times from the last meet. Chance was ready. And excited. The boys were all lined up in their lanes at the end of the pool waiting in anticipation for the buzzer to sound telling them it was time to start.
Except Chance who was waiting for the designated person to pull their arm down so he would know it was time to start seeing as how the buzzer could sound all night and day and Chance would still not know it was time to go.

The problem is, the person Chance was supposed to watch, was not standing in a good place for Chance to see them. In order to see their arm, Chance had to crane his neck at a weird angle and therefore was not be in a good position to start a competitive race. So, he came in 4th place. Which is still really good, but not where he wanted to be. Once he got off, he swam hard and made up time, just not enough to win.

Chance's dad decided that he would volunteer to be the person Chance watches next time as he will be much more aware of how important his location is to Chance's ability to start the race in good position and on time.

We'll have to be aware of this little glitch each time the hosting cities don't have the flashing light and rely on a person to tell Chance when it is time to go.

Self-advocating

2011-06-21T17:28:00.008-06:00

One of the main topics they stress to you as a parent of a deaf child is to teach your child to advocate for themselves. They won't always have you with them and besides, they have to have the ability to go out into the world and do things like tell their teacher when they can't hear, or have someone repeat the instructions when they missed what was said.

We have tried to ensure that Chance is expected to be as independent in the same things his older brother was at his age..whatever age that may be at the time.

That self advocating came to the forefront today when I got a phone call from Chance.

Chance called me from a neighbors house to ask me if his two friends could come to his little brother's T-ball game so that they could all play tennis during the game at the tennis courts at the Junior High.

Apparently though, the details had not been worked out before he called me because he kept talking to friends and working things out while we were on the phone. This was OK, but I was surprised that Chance would carry on a discussion with me, two friends and all of the background noise that was coming from his friend's house where they have 4 young children that I could hear making noise. He usually does not appreciate lots of noise while he is on the phone and will sometimes hand the phone to me if he is talking to someone and there is too much background noise on either end of the line.

The talking went back and forth for a minute, with Chance asking me if he could invite his friends, then telling his friend to ask his mom, then asking me what time the game started, then having his friend tell his mom etc. etc.

Then, Chance yelled, "EVERYONE QUIET!" Then a little softer, he added,"I'm on the phone."

Wow. Chance told the neighbors to be quiet in their own house? I think he was talking to all of his friend's siblings and not his friend's parents. Chance is not that brave enough to tell parents to be quiet. That is a good thing:)

It is true that he has been playing at this neighbor's house since he was 3 years old and it is the home of his oldest friend. But should he yell at all of them to be quiet?

Perhaps I should have a little talk with Chance and tell him that he should limit yelling at people to be quiet when he is on the phone when he is at someone else's house:)

Or perhaps he could ask everyone BEFORE he makes the call to please be quiet so he can hear on the phone.

Chance self advocating is a good thing. Maybe we should focus a little on technique now:)

Singing with the girls....

2011-06-19T23:11:00.000-06:00

Today in church, the kids played a game to help them learn the songs they will perform in the fall for the entire congregation.

Chance loves to sing and so when as part of the game, one of the songs was to be sung by "just the girls", Chance screwed up his face in frustration and signed to me as I was sitting behind him and over several seats,"I love this song! I want to sing!"

And then he did sing. With all of the girls in the room.

Of course this got some of the kids in the room laughing and pointing at Chance but he did not care and just sang on.

Chance's dad was up in the front of the room helping with a prop for the game and when his eyes caught mine, he nodded toward Chance and signed to me that Chance was singing. I could see that he was concerned that Chance had not heard that only the girls were to sing and now he was innocently singing along with the opposite sex.

I just smiled and half signed, half mouthed that Chance knew it time for just the girls to sing. He was just choosing to sing anyway.

As I watched Chance sing out undaunted by a few boys around him who were pointing and laughing at him, I thought how great it was that he didn't care about their reaction.

To me it showed that Chance is not self conscious about being different and does not feel the need to hide back in the shadows. He is deaf yes, but that does not define him. He was not worried that the other kids might think he didn't know only girls were singing. He didn't seem to care what they thought about him at all.
I hope he keeps this confidence forever and does not allow himself to be swayed by what others say.

The irony is, that the next step in the game, had only the boys sing the next verse. Chance looked back at me and with a big grin on his face, began to sing again. This time with the boys.

Chance is in the play

2011-06-14T00:24:00.000-06:00

Chance's school put on the play, "1,000 cranes", based on the book. Chance got a part with quite a few lines and he was devoted to practicing to the point that one night when I told him he had to go to bed he complained,"You are not letting me practice for the play like I am supposed to!"

I am a brute that way.

Chance did a great job and had all of his lines completely memorized. He got a little nervous on stage (who doesn't), but he had those lines down pat and he did a great job. I found myself thinking,"None of these people would guess this is a deaf boy if they didn't see the implants. He is confident and he presents himself very well. We are so proud of this boy of ours!

You've got a friend in me

2011-05-29T23:57:00.000-06:00

Chance has a good buddy that he has known since preschool. They are "two peas in a pod", a term both of them learned just this past week during their weekly speech session.

It just so happened that this friend ended up attending the same charter school this past year which both of them found most delightful.

Both boys wear implants...Chance has two, his friend has one. Chance is in fifth grade and his friend is in fourth grade. They were in the same grade until Chance bumped up a grade this past year and though Chance was happy to go up a grade, he really lamented the fact that he and his friend would now be in different grades.

Alas, the gods that be saw fit to place both of these boys at lunch during the same time and to allow them to spend afternoon recesses together. So it is only morning recess that they must be apart.

While talking to Chance's friend's mom about how cute they are together, she informed me that apparently a boy at school had been teasing and picking on her son. She then told me that Chance went up and set this boy straight, defending his friend, and now there does not seem to be a problem.

How great is that? Chance is nothing if not loyal and devoted.

So, don't mess with Chance's friends or you'll have to answer to Chance himself.

Chance gets his purple, orange and white belts

2011-05-22T22:42:00.000-06:00

Chance has been playing the recorder in his music class at school. He really enjoys it and his teacher has come up with a fantstic idea to motivate the kids. They earn "belts" like you do in karate, and you get colored strings tied onto the end of the recorder each time you pass into the next level. Chance now has several lovely colored strings hanging off the end of his recorder of which he is very proud.

His teacher told me that the kids get up and play songs in class and then get a new string when they pass off the song. He said that Chance has been passing off several songs and that the kids in class sit and cheer him enthsiatically when he is done each time. He says it is really neat.

These are some of the same kids who laughed at Chance when he sang to try out for a solo part in the program.

I think these kids have now earned some redemption:)

I love teachers at school who make learning fun and intersting.

Now, if we can just get Chance to put on his implants BEFORE he practices the recorder in the morning, all will be right in the world.

Yes, he actually did that one morning...get up and practice his recorder with out putting on his implants.

What a spaz. But a cute spaz.

You can count on me

2011-05-21T23:36:00.006-06:00

Chance and his brother went camping with their dad to a camp that let the boys experience life as a civil war soldier. They were not allowed to bring any technological devices, though Chance did inform us that he would be taking his implants with him despite the rules:)

Snacks were forbidden since civil war soldiers were not wolfing down granola bars, M&M's or corn-nuts in camp.

The campers all slept in the type of tents that were used during the civil war and marched around with their "guns" doing drills as the soldiers would have done.

The leaders or dads were in one huge tent and the boys were all in another huge tent. Chance and his brother went with some boys they knew in their scout troops but they also made some friends in camp. It was Chance's first scout camp out since he just turned 11, and he was very excited. The boys were all talking excitedy and enjoying themselves and then the lights out at 10:30 call came out. When you don't have modern flashlights, it is not as fun to stay awake in a dark camp.

When the wake up call came at 6:30 in the morning, Chance's dad said that it was like the boys had all woken up in unison just before the official revelry call and were laughing and awake in the kids tent. He realized that Chance had probably missed both the wake up call and the interaction between the boys first thing in the morning.

He needn't have worried. When Chance's brother realized that the boys were all waking up, he woke up Chance and had him put his implants on so Chance was in on all of the action from the beginning.

It does my heart good as a mother to know that Chance's brother is watching out for him and helping him to be involved in the activities. I am impressed that he thought of Chance right off even when he was talking with his new friends. He could have just left Chance to sleep until the morning wake up call went out and then wake him up. But he didn't.

I really think that Chance and his brother were sent down to our family by God to be together. They are close and watch out for each other. They may have a few moments of discord every once in a while, but they are devoted and loyal to one another which does my heart good. They will have each other to lean on and confide in and that is a great thing.

No electronic devices

2011-05-20T00:04:00.003-06:00

It is the time of year every child waits in anticipation for......year end testing in school.
Chance's class has been testing these past few weeks and some of these tests have taken place in the school library.
Before entering, the kids are admonished that NO electronic devices will be allowed and they are enumerated just in case someone forgets; no cell phones, no ipods no nothing.

The teacher that goes around with Chance's class through out the day told me that Chance made him crack up the other day as they entered the library. Chance walked up and said slyly,
"Mr. Nixon, I have electronic devices."
Then he tugged on his implants and laughed.
Indeed, Chance does have electronic devices and no one can do anything about it:)

Chance at speech fair

2011-05-10T23:36:00.003-06:00

Chance performed at the annual Alexander Graham Bell Associations sponsored Speech Fair again this year. Only this time, he played the guitar and sang,"You Are My Sunshine". He was excited to play and even ran into school to perform the number for his guitar teacher the day before since he was not going to be able to make it to the annual event.

The Speech Fair is always a bit of a walk down memory lane for us. It is a sort of "This is Your Life" scenario where we relive the years that Chance learned to hear and talk.

First, there are the preschoolers all tiny and a little nervous to perform. Their teachers have been working with them on their pronunciation for weeks leading up to this event. Whatever they end up singing or reciting is adorable. Parents get a little weepy thinking,"My deaf child is up there singing...look what they can do!"

Then the kindergartners get up with a little more confidence than the preschoolers and perform and parents sit in awe at the progress their child has made in pronunciation in just one year.

Then the first graders get up all confident and sing practically like pros. Parents beam in their seats as they marvel at the singing and talking abilities of their blossoming deaf or hard of hearing child.

Then there are the older kids who perform by themselves singing, dancing or playing a musical instrument. It is miraculous to behold how far these kids come in just a few years.

When Chance was really little, we would watch these older kids and get emotional wondering if someday Chance would be doing as well as they were. We would sit riveted in our seats as the kids introduced themselves and talked about how they were on the dance team or soccer team at school. Watching those older kids gave us hope and faith that someday Chance would be integrated into his neighborhood school and do things like join the local cub scout group and go to church with us just like any boy his age.

That day is here. Chance is thriving and completely integrated into local activities, be it church, cub scouts, or the city league track team. And one of the most touching things for me, were the parents who came up to me and told me how well Chance was doing and how they watched him and it gave them hope for their child.

The process continues. We watched other kids and got hope for Chance's future and now other parents are watching Chance and furthering their hopes for their own children. It is truly a blessing to be a part of this process, to walk down this road with Chance and to have him in our family. We love him.

When you can't hear the jack hammer, deaf is good

2011-05-03T08:28:00.003-06:00

We have men jackhammering through concrete in our basement. It is for a good cause in the long run, yet quite loud. The baby has not napped on the days the jack hammer has been going. I guess that is not a sound conducive to napping.

All of us deal with the sound in different ways. Such as not even attempting to perform a task that requires concentration and not talking on the phone. You can't hear what the person on the other end is saying anyway unless you go to the very end of the laundry room, turn off the washer and dryer and then you can hear some but not all of the converstation on the other end.

Chance we discovered however, is not bothered by such little nuances such as jackhammering when his implants are not on. This became apparent when the jackhammering started fresh and early in the morning for the rest of us, but Chance woke up and asked us as he sauntered to the kitchen,"Are the workers coming today?"

We all looked at each other in amazment.

"Don't you hear that noise?" I asked Chance as he faithfully watched my lips so he could see what I was saying.

"What noise?" Chance wanted to know.

Well then. The baby may not be able to nap through the jackhammering, but I think Chance wouldn't have a problem if he takes his implants off.

Sometimes, I kind of wish I had implants.

Chance knows his composers

2011-05-01T22:50:00.000-06:00

We were sitting Sunday morning watching the Mormon Tabernacle Choir perform a song for their "Music and the Spoken Word" program when Chance asked,"Is this music by George Frideric ? It sounds like his music. He used to write and conduct music for the queen of England."

"Where did you learn about George Frideric ?" I asked.

"Mr. Imler's class at school." Chance replied.

We looked up the composer and it turns out it was George Frideric Handel.

"Oh, I forgot the last part Handel." Chance replied.

Mr. Imler is the music teacher at school. Apparently, Chance has been paying attention in that class. AND hearing enough to be able to differentiate between composers to be able to know when music sounds like a certain one's work. Chance was right. The music the choir was singing was composed by George Frideric Handel. My deaf son picked that up by listening to a choir sing. I believe in miracles, and my son's hearing capabilities fall into the miracle range on days like today.

Thank goodness for miracles, Chance, and his music teacher Mr. Imler.

Things that go bump in the night...and day and midafternoon

2011-04-24T22:12:00.000-06:00

Chance is hearing things. I mean, he has been hearing things for many years now for which we are very grateful. Lately though, he has been hearing eerie things that make him highly nervous. He has come to me several times and told me that he hears footsteps, knocking or other random noises from our basement. This sort of thing gets to a kid. I have tried to figure out what he is hearing. The basement is mostly unfinished and part of the house upstairs has wood floors so the noise carries. I had Chance go downstairs and then I ran across the wood floor and back to see if that is what he is hearing.

It wasn't.

I have gone down to check out the noises when he hears them, but the noise is gone by the time I get there.

The mystery is, what is Chance hearing? We have been in this house for several years so one would think that all of the basic daily noises such as walking across the wood floor, or the dishwasher draining, would be noises that Chance has acclimated to.

I don't want Chance to be scared that someone is in the house which he has expressed as a possibility. We have bunnies that live downstairs and sometimes they make a ruckus in their cages, but again, we have had the bunnies for years so one would think Chance would be used to those noises.

Today, Chance's friend was over and apparently they both heard the noises but when I went down to check out what they were hearing, I heard nothing. Twice.

It is a mystery. In the mean time, I noticed that the last time Chance went downstairs with his friend, he was carrying his pellet gun down by his side like policemen do in movies as they search an area for a bad guy. Normally we do not let the boys carry their pellet guns around the house and Chance is quite compliant with this rule. I think he just wanted to feel armed in case the noise was attached to a bad guy.

We need to figure this mystery out so that Chance can feel secure in his own home.

The Tower of Terror

2011-04-17T21:26:00.000-06:00

Chance and his Mom (along with sister, far left, and brother, far right) try to save his implants.

I believe this photo right here, best describes the thoughts of Chance and me as we lunged downward in our Tower of Terror elevator. Who knew that the ride had a camera taking pictures and who could have planned for the camera to snap just as Chance's implant started to come off? Talk about perfect timing! We weren't familiar with the ride and were not sure if we should take the implants off or not. Turns out, we should have:) The implants took care of the problem themselves somewhat when one of them swung off and while Chance and I both watched in nervous anticipation landed a short distance ahead of us. It was added stomach butterflies to an already thrilling ride. Thankfully, we were able to reach the implant before the ride lurched downward again. The ride was great fun and after the implants were safely padded in my pocket, trouble free.

Living life on the edge

2011-04-10T11:33:00.013-06:00

There are those extreme people who like to live life on the edge. They scale mountains without using harnesses, they bungee jump off of the world's tallest bridges and they zoom through the darkness of the Space Mountain ride at Disneyland not being able to see or hear, reaching speeds of 55 miles per hour. What a thrill! Talk about living on the edge.

Well, our Chance is one of those thrill seekers. During our recent trip to Disneyland, due to the fact that we have never assessed at exactly what speed will cause the implants to let go of the magnet and fly off of Chance's head, Chance takes them off when going on roller coasters. Space Mountain is unique because you are hurling through outer space which as everyone knows is extremely dark except for a few dimpled lights provided by stars.


Chance (waving) and his brother get ready for "Blast Off" on California Screamin' Roller Coaster at California Adventure Park

I was curious to see how all of our kids liked the ride, but especially Chance who rode through the dark in silence with out hearing the nifty music or commands from mission control. Not even the screeches from other riders who give a clue as to impending dips or staggering heights on the tracks.

He loved it.

Maybe we can get him a nifty headband to hold them on, but then the microphones would be covered anyway so would that defeat the purpose?

Chance sings a solo

2011-04-03T23:26:00.000-06:00

Chance tried out for a solo part today in music class. If you wanted a solo part, you stood up in front of the class and sang a song while the whole class listened. Quite an act of bravery I would say at age 10. Heck, that is an act of bravery at ages 7-103. Singing in front of people takes courage and confidence.
Chance got up and started to sing, and then some of the students started to laugh at him. I don't know that Chance would have told us about this incident, but the chorus teacher at the school is also Chance's guitar teacher and he told Chance's dad when we took the boys for their guitar lessons.
The teacher told the laughing students that they were being rude and and he would not tolerate it in class and that everyone was to be treated with respect. (In his words, he "came unglued!!!") Chance told us that one of the boys came over and apologized after class.
Our little Chance's confidence was a little shattered and so I went in to do some damage control.
First off, I explained to Chance that he was incredibly brave to stand up and sing in front of the class and that his dad and I were proud of him.
Then I told him that I didn't know why, but some kids are just mean and rude. They make fun of kids who don't shoot the basketball that well (Chance is a good shot and plays the game,"Speed", at recess), or kids who don't wear clothes that they like or kids who are different than them. I told him that even adults have people who are rude to them sometimes. And sometimes, kids don't realize that they are being mean.
I told him that we just have to ignore those people who laugh, and that while it can hurt our feelings when they make fun of us, to try not to worry about those few kids. There are many many more people who are not laughing and we can't let the few who are stop us from doing the things we want to do.
I acknowledged that it was hurtful that those kids were rude and laughed, but that most of the class was not laughing. Then I told Chance about the time when I was in school and I went to try out for a part in a play and I sat in the back of the room watching other kids try out in front of an audience and then I chickened out and I never tried.
"You did?" Chance asked surprised.
Then I told him,"Chance, it takes courage to stand up and sing in front of the class, and if you want to sing a solo later in the school year, I think you should get up and try out again."
Chance took this in for a minute and kind of slowly shook his head.
I think he will try out again if it is something he wants to do. I hope that is the case because I don't want him to loose his confidence. I also don't want him to get a complex about performing in front of people. He may have kids that laugh at him due to the fact that it takes him longer to learn a song and sing right on key. I want him to have the confidence to go forward anyway. These kids have no idea what a miracle Chance's hearing is and how much harder he has to work than they do to sing. I want him to be able to get past those negative kids and press forward. Chance can sing, and he is getting better and taking lessons to teach him to hear the differences in the notes and then translate that into his singing voice. And he can do it. He'll have to learn to block out the naysayers who always seem to show up.
We have been very blessed in the fact that Chance has not had a lot of ridicule from other kids due to his deafness. I don't want him to acquire a complex about it now. I'm not even sure he equates his deafness to the laughing kids. I just want him to be able to dim the noise of the naysayers and go forward to where he wants to be.

Constrained to the back of the van

2011-03-28T23:05:00.000-06:00

After pulling into the garage after driving carpool, I heard Chance say to his little brother, "You have to get my implant back."

"Why does he have to get your implant back?" I asked.

"Because he took it and put it somewhere in the van," Chance replied, remarkably calm about the whole situation.

So I turned to my youngest son and asked,"Where is the implant?"

"Back there." He said pointing to the back of the van.

"Back there where?" I asked.

He shrugged.

"I think it is in the very back of the van." Chance replied.

Unfortunately the very back of our van which usually only has a stroller in it, had a box to go the thrift store and several play items which had not yet been removed after a week end family get together.

The search began with my youngest son at my side after I told him that he was not allowed to go into the house until we found the implant.

Chance soon joined us but we found that flat little implants can hide really well. Maybe getting a bland beige color so that it would blend in with Chance's hair better was not a good idea. Maybe we should have gone for neon green or something.

I started to imagine the reaction of the thrift workers as they came across the implant in the donated box: "Bob, Look! I found a CIA earpiece in this here box!"

Finally, the implant was located in the bed of the stroller where it had slid down and was only visible if you actually unfolded the stroller.

Problem solved. After Chance's little brother spend a little time in his bedroom, gave Chance a big hug and promised never to do that again.:)

Let the questions begin!

2011-03-16T16:23:00.006-06:00

I found myself in the lunchroom at Chance's school sitting in the middle of a table with several kids who had questions about Chance's deafness.
I had gone up to the school to help out in the writing class like I do each week, and Chance and I had eaten lunch together. I had to go to the office to take care of some things, so I sent Chance out to enjoy recess with his friends while I finished eating.
I noticed little kids around me looking at me so I said hello and asked them how they were doing. Then the questions started.
"You're Chance's mom huh?"
"Is Chance deaf or is he hard of hearing?"
"Was Chance born deaf?"

I explained that Chance was deaf and that they think his deafness was caused by a virus he caught when he was about 13 months old.

"What is a virus?" One of the boys wanted to know.

I explained the best I could what a virus was and how sometimes if a virus gets into our bodies it can make us sick.

"That DOES happen." One little boy turned and said to the others while nodding his head and looking very serious.

I have found that kids are very accepting of Chance's deafness, they are just curious about it which I think is great. I don't mind questions or conversations about Chance and his deafness. I am curious about things I see around me that I don't know much about too.

"I'm here every week so if you have any more questions let me know." I said.

"You're here on Wednesdays?" One boy asked.

When I replied in the affirmative, he nodded and got up to take his tray to the lunchroom.

So I wonder what we'll all talk about next week?

I'm dreaming of good vibrations...

2011-03-13T23:25:00.000-06:00

It was a dark and coldish night. Two people lay on the living room floor where they have dozed off. Suddenly, an unfamiliar noise rips through the house originating in the hall threatening to wake up all of the sleeping children in the bedrooms.
It is a rattling, no wait, banging, no wait, metallic kind of noise. Is it a machine gun? Is is a window being pelted by BB'S or rocks? Furthermore, where in the world is the noise coming from? Is someone with intent to do harm outside trying to flush us out or are they just going to storm the house?
After some searching, we realized the noise was coming from a metallic case in the hall. One of those money cash boxes with a handle. Do we want to open it to see what is inside? It could be dangerous. However, when faced with being maimed by an unknown force or having all 5 children awake in the wee hours of the night, it was an easy call to make. Open the case.
After bringing the case out into the living room and being now fully awake, the case was opened.
Uncertainty is now replaced by laughter.
Chance's vibrating alarm clock had been put into our metal cash box that the kids use when they are playing.
I do not recommend putting your vibrating alarm clock inside a metal box. Although it will wake up those who can hear it, it may also cause a heart attack if exposure is prolonged while coming out of a deep sleep. It may also possibly work to wake the dead. (However, it would still prove useless to those for whom it was bought - Chance would still sleep right through it)

The vibrating alarm clock may have been bought with Chance specifically in mind but it's vibrations did a great job of waking up his parents. Job well done.

The hat

2011-03-07T00:16:00.000-07:00

Chance got a new hat and he really really likes it. It is colorful and has flaps that hang down past his ears. Covering them.
Chance sometimes forgets that he is deaf and that wearing hats with flaps that cover his ears can impede hearing.
He looks really cute in the hat and I can understand why he would want to keep his head toasty here in the wintry wonderland that is our landscape some days.
He thinks he is hearing everything as usual. The irony of being deaf is, you don't know when you are missing out on things sometimes BECAUSE you can't hear what you are missing:)
So while Chance walks around looking all cute in his hat, he is not hearing as well as he does with out the hat.
If you ask him though, he will insist that he is hearing just fine.
This has been a theme for Chance this winter. He keeps his coat on and his hat over his ears when he enters school.
He wears a hoodie with the hat up to cub scouts.
At home, he likes to wear his hat with the flaps.
Hats are where it is at for Chance.
He just needs to realize that all of these hats impede his hearing when he keeps them on during school and scouts etc.:)
With spring on the way, maybe we can help Chance fall in love with a baseball cap type hat. Those leave the ears out and uncovered so the implant microphone is able to do its thing(namely catching sound) the best it can.

Sharing a splitter

2011-02-27T23:04:00.003-07:00

We just got back from a great family vacation to Southern California where we took in Disneyland, Sea World and went whale watching. Unfortunately, the whales were not aware that they were supposed to make an appearance but we got to see dolphins and sea lions swimming alongside our boat instead. We did get free tickets to go back and watch the whales so we'll just have to plan another vacation to watch the whales :)

During our 12 hour drive we set up a movie screen for the kids to watch while we traversed across the desert. We don't have one of those fancy screens that just gently descends out of the ceiling of the van, we instead have a DVD unit with two screens and we strap them to the back of the seats so each row can see the movie. In the past, we've had some problems with all of the kids hearing the sound, so we bought some splitters that allowed two kids to plug into each unit using headphones. Chance shared a cord with his older brother.

As we were crossing the desert and coming into the city of Las Vegas, Nevada, we were explaining some of the sights. We explained how the Eiffel Tower was a replica of the one in France. We pointed out the Pyramid, and Treasure Island that had a boat that reenacted a battle. We had been giving commentary for a good 10 minutes, when Chance's brother in the back seat yells up to us something like,"Hey! Look at that cool hotel that looks like the Eiffel Tower! And what is that castle right there?"

I turned around in my seat and said,"That's what we've been talking about for the past 10 minutes and then teasingly I asked,"Were you not listening to your parents?"

Chance's brother looked at me, then took his headphones off and said,"What?"

"We've been talking to you about these sights for the past while. " I said.

"SORRY!" He exhaled. "Chance has had the volume on so loud that I think I may be deaf now!"

Chance was blissfully unaware that things were apparently really really loud when you could hear.

"You have to tell him when that happens because he doesn't know. It is not loud for him." I explained.

After that, we didn't hear any more complaints about the volume. Chance just had no idea that it was that loud. That is what happens when you are deaf and listening to a movie through a NoizFree device (it's similar to earphones, but it sends a telecoil/radio signal to the implant as opposed to earphones that send the sound through the ear canal).

Apparently you have to tell Chance when the volume is too loud when you share a splitter with him:)

The Battle Still Continues

2011-02-20T23:54:00.012-07:00

The state school board is no longer considering dissolving the School for the Deaf and the Blind during this legislative session and instead is going to open an investigation to look at the inner workings of USDB (Utah School for the Deaf and Blind).

This is good news for the immediate future of the school. Hopefully, upon investigation, the school board will realize that cutting the School for the Deaf and Blind will only add more monetary needs to the state budget if the services currently provided by the school are expected to be dispersed out to all of the different school districts throughout the state that have deaf children. Not to mention who will have oversight over the services the deaf kids would receive through the district. Not just the oversight of their education but the oversight of their specific needs as deaf children. Without someone who knows the needs and the process it takes to learn to hear with a hearing aid or implant, and can guide that process, the kids will still be short changed regardless of what the district offers through a piecemeal system of speech therapy etc.
So now is the time for parents of deaf children and deaf adults to let the school board know just what the services provided from the School for the Deaf and Blind have made possible for kids and adults alike.

Chance is mainstreamed and academically at the top of many of his classes due in part to the services he received through the School for the Deaf and Blind. Chance was able to get what he needed to become successful. I honesty can not imagine what it would be like now if Chance had not received what he needed early on in school in the way that he needed to receive it.

One element of this battle over the function of the School for the Deaf is the friction that is present due to the two different philosophies over how to educate deaf children. Unless you have knowledge of this battle or are "baptized by fire" into the battle by having a deaf child and searching out services that they need, it is hard to imagine.

The school board has heard complaints about the School for the Deaf and some of those complaints revolve around how one feels deaf children should be educated. The debate has been playing out in the opinion sections of our two main newspapers. Some opinions have been more fair and balanced than others.

I appreciate the fact that we as the parents of deaf kids may choose different methods to communicate and educate our children. That is a right that every parent should be afforded.

I do have a problem though when it implied or just out right stated that we parents who have chosen the oral/speech route for our children do it because it is easier for us and not best for our children.

An article in the Salt Lake Tribune titled,"Schools for the Deaf Grapple With Two Tracks," talks about the basically two tracks to teach deaf kids to communicate. A deaf adult who teaches deaf children at a mainly signing schools asks,"How do parents know which language the child needs?" The context of this question is based on the process that parents go through when their child is diagnosed. Changes have been made to ensure that when a child is diagnosed, the family receives a visit from both a deaf adult who signs and a deaf adult who listens and speaks. After some exposure to both routes by the visitors and other contact by professionals, a family is asked to choose which path they would like to follow. You aren't married to that choice. If you start on one path and realize that it is not working, you can switch over and follow another path. The point is to get language into these little kiddos pronto. No matter which way you choose, a language has to be learned. Sign language is not something you will just pick up if you are not surrounded by signing people in your family. And if a family chooses sign, the whole family needs to be involved in learning to sign.

If a child is learning to listen and speak, they will need help with that route as they are fitted with hearing aids or implanted with cochlear implants. And there is a language window when it is better for children to learn to speak. Hearing kids are learning to speak from the day they are born as they hear sounds and learn words. Kids who are implanted early, join their peers in mainstream classrooms earlier and generally speaking are extremely successful with an implant.

When Chance was diagnosed, we were exposed to a deaf adult who signs and that is all. We had to actively seek out the other option of speaking and listening. Frankly, our main concern was only for Chance. We even looked at enrolling at a neighboring university to major in sign language. We took sign classes...all of us. Speaking and listening was right for Chance and it was not decided on a whim. As far as the question of "How do parents know which language the child needs?" Could that not go both ways? And as parents we are precisely the ones who know what our children need. That is our job as parents to seek out what our children need and provide the best we can.

The argument was made by this same person in the article that she supported choice, but that it should be the child's choice and that parents often chose listening and speaking for their children because it is convenient for them.

Um, being brutally honest here, nothing about teaching a deaf child to communicate is convenient. Convenient is your hearing children who learn to speak just by living with you. You don't even have to give it a second thought, it just happens as you are going about your days. This argument does not seem to be brought up when it involves signing deaf parents who choose to teach their deaf child to sign. If parents who choose speech and listening are questioned with, "How do parents know which language the child needs," could not signing parents be asked the same thing? The problem is the second guessing of parents by others at all.

There is a lot of commitment involved regardless of which method you choose to teach your deaf child to communicate with. Convenience is not what motivates parents. Being a parent is rarely about what is convenient for the parent. Giving all within your power to give your child what they needs is usually what motivates parents. To imply that parents who choose to teach their child speaking and listening are somehow selfish, and would be willing to short change their child just for convenience, is not only grossly unfounded, but very mean spirited.

The School for the Deaf should be able to operate with the two methods to teach deaf children together. Parents who choose sign should be respected and supported in what they need just as parents who choose listening and speaking parents should be respected and supported. It does not have to be a war. There is no right or wrong here, there is only CHOICE. And parents are entitled to choose what is best for their child without judgement.

The battle continues...

2011-02-07T00:19:00.000-07:00

I woke up Saturday morning to the news that in these lean times the state is considering getting rid of the Schools for the Deaf and the Blind to save money in the state budget.

My first reaction was,"WHAT?"

Who is kidding who, that is still my reaction.

I feel getting rid of the School for the Deaf and the Blind would be a travesty. There are many reasons I feel this way.

First of all, I understand that economically this is a hard time for many people and by extension the state. I understand that there are more programs and services than money. Heavens, we all deal with this all of the time in our families. You have to pick and choose what are the most important needs and go with those.

I truly feel that the Schools for the Deaf and the Blind is one of those important elements that the state should leave intact even in this difficult economy.

Not all government services give back to the community ten fold as the kids who get what they need from the Schools for the Deaf and the Blind do. If these kids like Chance get the services that they need while they are young, they can acquire language skills and integrate into their neighborhood schools where they learn along side their peers like any other child. Just those few years of intervention by specialists can literally work miracles in these kids lives. They flourish and grow and are able to reach their potential in a way that is remarkable. Shifting this task to the school districts would be a travesty. Each and every district could not provide the spealization that is required for these deaf children to aquire language. I truly feel that the services offered through school districts could be nothing but substandard. School districts have enough they have to do and adding kids requiring such specialized help in the beginning would not be possible.

The Schools for the Deaf and Blind have the professionals already in place along with years of experience. In order for each district to acquire the specialists to help these kids would be near impossible. Not to mention a huge increase in expense. Which is truly cheaper, having a consolidated school that specializes in helping deaf children get what they need and then moving them out to their regular schools, or expecting each school district to acquire and provide these services individually?

Deaf children need specialized schooling beginning at age 3 in preschool. I cannot fathom school districts being able to provide these services. I believe we would see a huge drop in the quality and progress of deaf children. Years of experience and methods that work would be thwarted.

Not to mention the dedication of these professionals. I truly felt that my son was loved by many of the people that provided services. They were devoted.

The money put into these deaf kids now, pays off 10 times what is put in within a few short years. Many times the children are able to perform at the same level as their peers and reach their potential which includes having the capabilities to eventually go out into the world and support themselves and their families.

We have written our representatives and parents of deaf children are going to gather at the state capital this week to make our presence known. Our representatives need to see what these deaf kids are capable of and what a specialized focus on language and hearing can do for years and years to come.

No money will be saved by cutting the Schools for the Deaf and the Blind. In the long run money and services will be lost.

I can only imagine what parents of blind children are going through at this suggestion.

We need to put faces to the numbers for the legislators so they can see who this will directly affect, which would of course be the deaf and blind children of Utah.

There is hope. Our representative lives next door to a deaf child who went to school with Chance for many years. She has seen the impact the early intervention has had and she has many disabled children herself as she and her husband adopt children who have special needs.

I believe we have many allies on capital hill. We'll just pray for the number of our allies to outnumber the naysayers.

That explains a lot.....

2011-01-24T00:29:00.000-07:00

It is the end of term at school and all of the assignments are due. The writing teacher let the kids look at their progress report in the middle of the week so they could make up any assignments that may be missing.

Chance was missing 3 sets of journal entries which totals 15 pages total. And he got zeros on every spelling test.

Huh?

So Chance spent a pleasant if not slightly annoying night at the kitchen table writing. And writing. And writing.

Chance was adamant that he had done the work and I felt for him, but as I told him,"If the teacher has no record of it, you have to do it again."

And after all of that work, Chance came home on Friday with all of the pages still in his binder because he forgot to turn them in.

Naturally, I was annoyed that all of that work might go for naught, so I drove him back up to the school to turn the papers in so he could get credit for his work. Chance explained to me that he had therapy every Friday during writing and that is why he forgot to turn his work in. That made sense. If he he didn't attend class, it would be easy to forget to turn in the work.

We met his teacher in the hall as she was coming out of faculty meeting.

As we were talking, the teacher mentioned that Chance was marked absent in writing that day. I told her that he was in therapy and that is why he forgot to turn in his work.

His teacher paused and then asked,"Does Chance have therapy every Friday?"

When I explained that he did his teacher responded,"Friday is when we call for the journal entries and take the spelling tests. Chance probably didn't have any idea that we were calling for journal entries."
It was a moment when a light bulb went on for both of us. Chance's missing assignments were due to the fact that Chance was never in class when they were called for. We were scratching our heads at home trying to figure out why our very conscientious and driven Chance would be missing so many assignments. It would also explain why we could find several journal entries in Chance's various notebooks yet they had not been turned in.

The writing teacher explained that each Friday, the writing teachers took turns teaching the lessons so each teacher only taught every 3rd Friday so no one had realized that Chance was gone each Friday.
WHEW! This explained a lot.

Chance was adamant that he had been doing the assignments and seemed genuinely confused as to why he had so many zeros on his progress report.

So, now we can work on the logistics of letting Chance turn in his assignments on Mondays (after having time to make up Friday's journal), so he is getting credit. Also, we can arrange for Chance to take the spelling tests on another day.

Spelling is one of Chance's strongest points which has always amazed me since he spent several years not hearing the words he spells. He can spell words he doesn't even know the meaning of. Due to this fact, I told the teacher that Chance could probably take the missing spelling tests right then which he did. 100 percent as I expected.

So, the moral of this story is, we need to communicate with the proper teachers and therapist so that everyone knows what the schedule is and so Chance does not go crazy wondering what in the world the expectations are :)

The gift of spelling

2011-01-24T00:18:00.004-07:00

Chance has a gift. He can spell. I mean really really spell. Some people are just good at spelling and Chance is one of them. I remember reading once that good spellers are ALWAYS good readers - the two go hand in hand. Chance does love to read. Sometimes way later than he should, in fact. He'll get engrossed in a book and read in bed long after he should be sleeping.

What amazes me about Chance's spelling though, is that Chance has not heard the words all of his life like I have. He could not sound them out in kindergarten the way that I did because Chance wasn't hearing the subtle sounds in all of the words. For many years Chance wasn't hearing all of the subtle syllables of many words. Yet, here he is an incredible speller. He can spell words he doesn't know the meaning of. He'll spell the word perfectly than turn to me and ask,"What does that word mean?"

Since Chance has therapy every Friday and thus misses the spelling tests, the teacher and I were discussing what we could do to help Chance earn points for the tests he misses. She wondered if she should just exempt Chance from the last two spelling tests since he was in speech therapy and the term was now over. I told her that one day when she was sick and there was a substitute, the teacher had passed out a list of several hard words for the kids and had them test each other and then write down the words they missed to practice. Chance missed two words out of at least 50 words. Some of the words he spelled correctly and then turned to me and asked,"What does that word mean?"

In a bold display of confidence in my boy, I told the teacher that she could probably give Chance the spelling test right then and he would do O.K. So, that is what she had me do. While she was in the corner of the room gathering papers, I administered a spelling test to Chance. He aced it with 100 percent.

Good heavens. How do you become an expert speller when you are deaf? I heard words just fine in school, yet I didn't always get them right. Even when I slowly repeated the words in my head or whispered them to myself as I sounded them out, "annoying" or whatever the word may have been.

Yet Chance who doesn't have the experience with hearing words that I do, can spell like a pro. It is an amazing phenomenon.

The love of a brother

2011-01-19T00:01:00.000-07:00

Chance has had a steady and passionately devoted right hand man as he has traveled this path of deafness.

When Chance was first diagnosed, there were some friends of his brothers in the neighborhood who would complain and run away when Chance would come to join them in play. Chance's brother told them that if Chance didn't play, then he didn't either.

This past year at school, some girls were constantly hitting and poking Chance's brother. It was all supposed to be fun and games but Chance's brother did not really like it. He endured it. One day these girls decided to start doing the same thing to Chance. His brother stood up and said,"Nobody hits my brother!"

When Chance was first diagnosed and entered preschool through the "School for the Deaf," Chance was traumatized and cried and cried when I dropped him off each day. I would watch through the two way mirror heartbroken as my baby struggled. The school asked me if Chance had ever been away from home for a night. I told him he had not. "No weekends away with grandma or grandpa?" they asked. I replied that he had had no such weekend. I had a new baby that prohibited me from staying at the school for long and it was devastating to see how Chance struggled. His world had been turned upside down seemingly overnight. Chance was having multiple tests done to check his hearing, he had just received hearing aids and now he was thrown into a world with lots of people that he had never seen before. Plus he was going through the summer when other kids his age were at home playing.


Chance and his brother dressed up for Halloween

Enter Chance's brother who volunteered to attend the older class in the same building as a model for language (kids who hear normally and can model language for the little deaf children). Chance and his brother did not attend the same classes, but they saw each other at recess and during lunch. The teachers told me Chance would run to his brother when it was lunch time and his brother would take him under his wing and help him feel secure.

This meant that Chance's brother was also missing out on summer playing but he never complained once.

When Chance signed up to sing in the Alexander Graham Bell Association's Speech Fair last year, it became apparent that though Chance knew the song quite well, it was a difficult song with many shifts and he had a hard time staying on tune during some parts. Chance's brother who was in chorus with Chance volunteered to go up on stage and sing with Chance. He sang real soft, just enough so that Chance could stay on tune. Chance's brother knew it was Chance's moment to shine and simply stood back and smiled as the applause came in after the performance.

Chance's brother has always made sure that in settings with large groups etc. that Chance was part of things and knew what was going on. A neighbor who used to watch the kids while I had appointments etc. said that she was so impressed with how Chance's brother and sister looked out for Chance to make sure that he knew when they were being offered snacks or knew what was going on in the game etc. She said that you could see the love between them.

This past year Chance has been in a school that is a little different than most schools for kids Chance's age. Instead of being in one class all day, Chance rotates through several different classes with different teachers in each class. It is the first year this school has been open and there have been lots of changes and adjustments to be made during the first several months as things get going.

Chance has struggled some with all of the changes. Enter his brother once again. Staff at the school worked out a deal with Chance that if he attended each class he earned points that he could redeem for a little time during the afternoon with.....his brother.

Chance has been a little trooper and forged ahead in an astounding way through his deafness. He has had a most devoted ally during the process in his brother and it has been a great blessing to both of them and a wondrous thing to watch as a parent.

Chance learning the guitar

2011-01-09T19:55:00.001-07:00

Chance's guitar lessons are coming along quite well. As an added bonus, he is learning the words and tunes to many new songs and learning to keep time as he plays.

If the implants are off, just whisper

2010-12-28T01:33:00.001-07:00

I witnessed a fascinating occurrence at our kitchen table this morning. Chance was playing Legos with his brothers and sisters without implants on. Ironically, the game required communication between the parties as one child was operating the airplane, another the police station and so on and so forth.
Chance could of course communicate his preferences just fine. He just couldn't hear if anyone disagreed with his line of thinking.

At one point, his sister took issue with where the runway for the airplane was. Chance looked up at her when she landed the plane in the wrong location according to his way of thinking.

So they argued:
Chance's sister whispering her opinion, "Chance, there is not enough room there!"
Chance: 'Oh yes there is! It needs to land next to the police station where I made room!"
Chance's sister: " No! Let's have an airport over here!"
Chance: " We have to leave room over there for the fire station!"

I'm not quite sure why Chance's sister felt the need to whisper. She knew he couldn't hear her, but maybe it freaks her out a little just to mouth the words to him so she whispers just so there is still sound coming out of her mouth. Chance tends to be loud sometimes when his implants are off. He has no idea how loud he is of course.

It was an interesting method of communicating. I sat just watching them fascinated and wondering how it would all end. They eventually came to some resolution with their little brother and sister code of communicating. I wonder if they'll do it again?

Note to self....

2010-12-28T01:29:00.000-07:00

Note to self: NEVER just pick up Chance's ipod and tune in to see what is playing. This act could cause some hearing loss for the hapless victim who wanted to know what Chance was listening to. Since Chance listens to the ipod through a NoizFree telecoil cable, we don't know exactly what the listening experience is like for him. But I now know, that he has that ipod volume cranked to the hilt as I casually picked up his ear buds and turned it on. Woo Hee, I may hear that song ringing in my ears for the rest of the night. Or possibly forever.

Sooooo, the next time I pick up Chance's implant to listen in, I am turning the volume down first or I may experience some hearing loss myself.

I don't think Santa heard me

2010-12-07T23:45:00.010-07:00

I can honestly say that we rarely have major mistakes or misunderstandings due to the fact that Chance is deaf anymore. Chance can hear so well with his implants combined with his being the ripe old age of 10 that we rarely have those heart breaking incidents that make our hearts cry because Chance missed some major event due to his deafness.

We had one of those during the children's program at church when Chance was about 5 years old. One of the songs the kids were singing had signs to go along with it and Chance loved that song. Unfortunately, Chance missed the first few notes of the song, so even though he was sitting right out front, he did not start with everyone else and it was kind of his song. As all of the kids around him started singing and signing, Chance looked around and burst into tears. I quickly joined him on the stage and tried to catch him up to speed, but he wanted them to start over so that he was ready. Programs usually don't stop and rewind though. He was heart broken.

We had another one of those moments on a train bond for the North Pole this past week on the North Pole Express. We had cookies and yummy hot chocolate, read stories and sang Christmas carols. All of this culminated with our arrival at the North Pole where Santa boarded the train and visited with each child. You can imagine the excitement and bustle that accompanies a train car loaded with children who are visiting with Santa.

When Santa got to our seats, we hurriedly gathered all of the kids together for a group photo. The lighting in the train car was dim and it took us a few seconds to get our camera on the right setting. After getting a very cute picture, it was time for each of our kids to tell Santa what gift their little hearts most desired for Christmas. Santa was a little bit in a rush this year and unfortunately, Chance was the child closest to Santa and he missed the question of "What do you want for Christmas?", and instead sat grinning his pleasure at being right next to Santa. Chance's dad and I had to point out to Chance that he needed to hurry and tell Santa what he wanted, since Chance had not heard the cue. If only only one of his siblings had been next to Santa to get the ball rolling with the gift requests, because it took Chance a few seconds to realize that it was his turn and he only got one little sentence out before Santa was hurriedly on the move to the next child.

It should be noted that we have ridden on the North Pole Express train several times over past Christmas seasons and usually the visit with Santa goes off with out a hitch. I think Santa was in a hurry to make sure he got to visit with all of the kids since we were on the first train car and their were many more cars loaded with waiting children.

It should also be noted that Chance is a dedicated believer, wondering over the magic of Santa and his reindeer and delighting in the whole Christmas season. He was therefore a little crest fallen at Santa's hurried manner since in all of the bustle and noise, Chance did not always hear things the first time they were said.

After Santa had moved on to the next row of kids, I saw that Chance looked a little bewildered and upset so I pulled him down next to me and asked in a cheery voice what he had asked Santa for. Chance hung his head as he tried to hide the tears that were forming.

"I didn't get to tell him I wanted a rubber band gun." Chance whispered. " I don't think he heard me because he was walking off."

This was the first I had heard about a rubber band gun and it turned out that Chance was hopping to rely the message to Santa that he wanted a long board AND a rubber band gun for Christmas.

When you are a true believer in the magic of Santa, this is a devastating development.

Luckily, Mrs. Claus comes through the train a bit after Santa, so after I explained that Chance was not able to tell Santa all that he wanted, Mrs. Claus got down at eye level with Chance and told him that she would give Santa the message with assurances that Santa really listened to her and she had some pull as far he was concerned.

So Chance is hoping that the message did indeed get passed on. He has been talking about the wonders that a rubber band gun would bring into his life and used the topic as the basis for his persuasive paper he had to write in 5 grade writing class.

I guess we'll see when we come out to see what is under the tree on Christmas morning.

The apology

2010-12-07T23:45:00.009-07:00

Chance came home from cub scouts and I could tell that something wasn't quite right. I called him over to where I was doing the dishes and asked him what was up.
He told me that after scouts, the boys had all been playing on a trampoline and he had touched the football and one of the boys had shoved him.
"Then what happened?" I asked. "Did any of the boys say anything?"
"I don't know." Chance said,"because my implants fell off when he pushed me."
At this point I realized that this must have been quite a shove if it made Chance's implants come off.
"Did any of the boys say anything when he did that?" I asked.
"I don't know because I was getting my implants." Chance said.

This is where the beauty of having a deaf child comes in. I know the boy who shoved Chance and there has never been an issue with him before.

"Maybe he apologized while you were getting your implants." I said.

Chance shrugged.

"Ya, maybe he apologized and you just didn't hear it."

Since that really could have happened and we will never know for sure, I thought it was good for Chance to end our conversation on a positive note:)

The blessings of technology

2010-12-06T01:04:00.000-07:00

One of our adult deaf friends saw Chance at a music conference and said that she was amazed to see that even with the noisy hallway and bustle, Chance was able to carry on a conversation with a woman she introduced him to with out looking at her the whole time.

Yes, we are thankful for technology and what it has done for Chance. He was truly born at a good time to be deaf, with the invention of implants and all of the technology that is available. From computers to texting to subtitles, being deaf isn't as isolating as it once was.

We feel very blessed to have Chance in our family and to all of those who have helped Chance and continue to help Chance blossom into an ordinary 10 year old boy who is not held back by being deaf.

Sometimes, I want to remind Chance that he is indeed deaf when he tries to tell me that he does not need his FM system in every class or when he lops questions at me through the shower curtain when his implants are off. Oh the funny stories we can tell when Chance has children of his own.

"Remember when you used to ask what we were doing that day as you lathered up in the shower and I came in to throw a towel over the rail? As if you could hear anything I said in response?"

"Remember how you would ask us about our conversations first thing in the morning when you weren't going to be able to hear any answer we gave?"

Good times, good times.

It is a good time with Chance. We are so grateful for him and for all that he adds to our family. And we continue to grow in gratitude for the devices that allow him to hear and mingle with all of the kids his age in school, at cub scouts and in the neighborhood.

I am so grateful to the man who invented implants. I hope he realizes what a blessing he is to kids like Chance.

It's not over 'till the deaf kid sings

2010-11-28T22:31:00.002-07:00

Chance has begun his journey into the world of singing lessons. We want to be very careful as at this point, Chance has no issue with singing and is quite confident is his abilities. Chance tends to sing monotone at times, but we think that is a situation that can be unlearned as Chance is exposed to music, taught how it works and learns to listen for the difference in the various notes.

I have never wanted to post anything that will cause Chance embarrassment and cause reason for Chance to enter therapy as an adult:) Chance knows that I am posting this video of him singing and is fine with it. He is quite confident in his singing abilities and we are quite happy with that. Chance sings in school productions, at AG Bell Fairs and at church without a second thought. As has always been the case, we want Chance to be able achieve all that he is capable of and believe that singing can be a real strength for him in spite of his deafness. He hasn't been held back so far in anything he has attempted!

I post his singing now to show where he is as we are starting this journey and will add other samples of Chance singing as we go along. My hope is to chart his progress and document how far we have come.

Here is Chance reading/singing the story of "Frosty the Snowman", to some of his siblings for a bedtime story. He is a great big brother.

Chance and his guitar

2010-11-15T23:14:00.004-07:00

Chance has started on what we hope will be a long illustrious relationship with a guitar and music.
Chance's dad and I approached the choir and music teacher at his school as we had heard that he had given voice lessons before. We explained how Chance tends to sing in a monotone and not fluctuate his voice as much as he needs to when he sings. (Chance was actually with us at the time so we had to word things carefully:), but we thought he had the desire and ability to be quite a good singer.

The teacher paused and kind of stroked his chin for a minute. Thankfully, Chance got otherwise engaged at this point so we could all talk a little more frankly. The teacher explained to us that he was not trying to put us off, he just wanted to make sure that he could do it.
He told us that he feels terrible when he can't help a child learn to sing and that it had happened just once when he worked with a little girl who really struggled.

I was preparing for a gracious rejection of our request. But instead, he had Chance come over and sing a little something for him. Then he told us that he did not have any experience working with deaf kids and singing. We told him that we understood that.
He then said he would love to give it a try with Chance.

Chance can sing, we just need to help him get the most out of his hearing to recognize the subtle note changes in songs and practice.
The music teacher thinks highly of Chance which of course helps:)

The music teacher thought that learning to play the guitar while Chance is taking singing lessons would help him to hear the different notes and teach him how music works. Chance thought that was one of the best ideas ever. Chance has been asking to take guitar lessons for a while but I have been telling him he needs to learn the piano first for which he has been taking lessons.
The teacher let Chance hold a guitar and had him strum it. Chance beamed.

So it is that Chance has started taking guitar and voice lessons. He is so excited and has been practicing as well. When the boys returned after their first lesson, the teacher was impressed with how well they had done in one week.

Chance's brother has been asking to play the guitar longer than Chance has. So we realized that if we let one, we should let the other. Now our boys are learning to play and sing together. The music store is now a bit richer from our purchase of two guitars and I expect great things from this venture! And lots and lots of music in our future!

Chance and the Fm system

2010-11-14T22:51:00.000-07:00

Chance has an FM system on loan from the School for the Deaf that he is using. Well, the idea is that he is using it, but apparently, Chance is picking and choosing which classes he will use it in.

The thought running through my head is this,"So, Chance who is deaf, is going to decide when he can hear enough and when he can't?" Built into that thought is the fact that since Chance is deaf, HE DOESN'T ALWAYS KNOW WHAT HE ISN'T HEARING! "

Yet Chance is trying to convince me that some classes warrant using the FM system and some do not. I can understand not wanting to use it in P.E. as it is cumbersome to run around playing capture the flag with an FM system attached to your person. And frankly, I don't know that anything would help Chance hear everthing in the cavernous gym where thousands (ok, it is more like 20, but when they all are yelling, laughing and carrying on, it sounds like thousands) of 5th graders are dashing about their voices bouncing off the walls and ceilings creating a force of sound that is not unlike a jet taking off.

However, social studies? Chance's peers give presentations in that class sometimes on reports they have done. Chance is certain that he hearing all of that?

And what about the fact that I have been in some of these classes helping out and I have seen how the class can start quiet with all the kids sitting and writing individually but by the end the teacher is up front discussing spelling rules?

I am tempted to attend each class and let Chance use or not use the FM system at his leisure but then ask him questions about details about what was said and see if he caught them all. I am betting that he didn't.

We have actually set up a payment program (OK, bribe) for the next little while to reward Chance for each class he uses his FM system in. I am willing to wager that if he were to wear the system in every class, with the exception of P.E. and dance, he would find all sorts of interesting details that he hasn't been catching.

Sweet Dreams !

2010-11-07T22:10:00.007-07:00

Our oldest son is taking a short trip with the other boys in his church class to a temple very early one morning and we were trying to figure out carpooling for the activity.

Chance's dad and I realized that both of us could drive our two cars and deliver the boys to their destination and then I could come home as all of our kids should just be sleeping while we were gone. In our discussion, we talked about how Chance could just be on alert for any cries etc. for the short time I was gone.

Then we looked at each other as it dawned on us that Chance may not be good for this task. Chance can't hear squat during the early morning hours. A robber could enter the house and make as much noise as he wanted and he would be safe from detection from Chance. The house could be on fire with beams crashing to the floor and the baby could be screaming and Chance would lay nestled up to his pillow snuggled in blankets.

Hmmmm.

We could slap his implants on him before we leave, but would that really work? He could hear stuff, but would he awake from a dead sleep for a crying baby? Chance doesn't like to put his implants on for a bit after he wakes up and it seems mean to wake him up in the wee hours just to put his implants on. The point of our plan was that all of the kids could just sleep for the 10 minutes I was gone, but should someone need something, Chance would be on call. Except he can't hear anything.

So, we will be getting another adult to drive so I can stay home :)

Chance is going to have the ultimate excuse as to why he doesn't get up in the night when his own babies cry. He can honestly say,"I didn't hear anything!" and sleep blissfully on :)

Fine tuning the speech...

2010-10-31T22:21:00.004-06:00

Chance's speech is coming along very well. He can hear the sounds he needs to pronunciate for almost all he hears. There are a few errors that we need to work on, but the thing we notice the most now, is language usage.

Chance will hear a new word, and I think he just hears it and then starts using the word the way he thinks the word is used. This is great as it is exactly what kids do when they are learning language. Every once in a while though the words Chance chooses to use are not the usual way of saying things. This is fine, because he is still learning vocabulary as are all of the kids his age. Certain words though, his peers would already know.

For example, Chance was distressed because one of his friends at school had not been there for 3 days in a row.

I expressed to Chance that maybe his friend was sick. The flu is going around and it can easily knock someone out for 3 days.

Chance hung his head and said," No, I think he has been transported."

Doing some quick thinking about what that could mean in the context of our conversation, I realized that what Chance meant was, he thinks his friend had been transferred. As in transferred to another school.

THESE are the sorts of things we need to fine tune now. Helping Chance clarify what some of these new words he is picking up mean.

Thankfully, Chance's friend Ryan had not been transported. He had been deer hunting.

See October 15th:)

2010-10-25T12:17:00.004-06:00

I just noticed that since I started the blog entry I posted last night a bit ago, it posted BELOW the one I posted last week. So, in order to read the latest entry, scroll down and read about the reading scores started on October 15, but posted October 25th:)

Deep conversations

2010-10-17T23:00:00.000-06:00

Chance just LOVES to have these deep conversations when his implants are off. Tonight, I was at the computer when Chance came up and said,"Do you know what is really bad? It would be awesome to go to the moon. I would LOVE to go to the moon in the future, but I probably can't."
"Why?" I asked as it dawned on me that Chance had his implants off so of course this was just the right time to have an in depth discussion about his odds of landing on the moon someday.
"Because you can't even see black holes and then they just suck you in."
"People on earth help you land on the moon if you go." I said looking right at Chance so he could read my lips.
"Did you know that if you get stuck in a black hole, it stretches you out like a piece of spaghetti?"
I did not know this actually.
"Imagine your guts floating in space." Chance said as he walked off.

Well, at least he is not worried that being deaf or having implants will keep him from flying to the moon someday. He is just worried that his guts will be strewn across space when he gets sucked into a black hole that snuck up on him.

Chancc's reading scores are back

2010-10-15T21:58:00.010-06:00

We just got Chance's reading scores back from parent teachers conference. Chance's charter school is run more like a junior high school in the fact that the kids don't have just one teacher but instead rotate throughout the day to several teachers. There is a writing room, a math room, a science room and so on and so forth. There is one "homeroom" teacher who receives all of the test scores and who is our contact point should we need information. The reading test covered reading and comprehension. Chance scored WELL above average in both categories for 5th grade, the grade he just transferred into.

Chance's writing teacher said that Chance is in the highest writing group as well and is self motivated and on task. Then she told me what a special soul Chance was and how privileged she feels to be around him and teach him. Then she said, "surely you know this." I actually do know what an incredible soul Chance has. I am delighted to know that his teacher sees it as well. I help out in Chance's writing class each week and I get to see how Chance is self motivated and focused. He really desires to do well and applies himself as best he can.

Oh, my little deaf son is scoring above average in reading!!!!! Deaf children traditionally have been known to be behind in reading. I think that is changing, but Chance went without language for 2 years and he was not all that excited about reading when he started.

Now, he comes to me with all sorts of interesting facts he has learned about in books.

We as parents were asked in our parent teachers conference to list Chance's academic strengths. We listed reading and math and writing. I think we chose well:)

Most people around Chance will just see how well he is doing in school and take that for granted. Few people will know how incredible the journey Chance has experienced has been. How Chance himself overcame such odds to get where he is. He went without language for 2 years and through determination and sheer grit, Chance overcame this monumental obstacle and forged ahead overcoming the incredible barrier that going without language for 2years during your formative years is.

Chance does have an incredible soul and I stand in awe of him and his amazing strength and perseverance. Chance is not held back by his deafness and he is willing to work his heart out to succeed in all that he does. An incredible soul indeed. A soul I am honored to call my son.

The door slams

2010-10-11T00:50:00.000-06:00

This past weekend, Chance's uncle took Chance and some of his siblings with cousins to spend the night in a cabin he was watching for the weekend.

When we went to pick them up, it was apparent that a good time was had by all. The cabin was perched up at the top of a mountain in bear country. It was fenced around the perimeter of the cabin so one could feel relatively safe playing outside.(I know, I know, a little fence will not always keep a marauding bear out, but there have been few bear sightings during the cabin's life which started in 1962, and what can you do, never enter the woods because there might be a bear?).

The kids made forts out of wood and branches that were quite well built. There was a boy hut and a girl hut with windows and everything. There were trees that had been chopped down, deer wandering through camp, footballs thrown in the open spaces and popcorn kernels hurled into the open fire and popped back out as popcorn. It is a great place to be a kid.

Along with enjoying sounds of nature in the woods, the extended family got to experience the sounds of Chance. The melodic sound of doors closing in the night, that is. Chance has not done this behavior for a while at home, but apparently, he was inspired to revive his old routine at the cabin.

Before we knew Chance was deaf, he about gave us a heart attack some nights because as we lay sound asleep, blissfully dreaming, Chance would slam a door somewhere in the house when he got up in the middle of the night and scare us to death. It is a very unsettling thing to wake up to a door slamming. At first you don't know what is going on and wonder if you should hide from invaders that have entered your home and call 911. Chance, who can not hear the door slam is blissfully unaware that anything is amiss and just goes about his business. It has been a while since those of us at home have been blessed with the closing of the doors in the middle of the night, but perhaps the mountain air prompted Chance to close the doors again. My personal theory is, Chance can hear the doors but very softly and since he was in a new place, maybe a kind of scary place when you get up in the middle of the night, he closed the door for comfort. To hear something, anything in the great silence that is Chance's world at night when his implants are no longer on.

The result was, everyone knew when Chance got up to tinkle in the night.

Chance is a celebrity

2010-10-03T23:05:00.000-06:00

When I asked Chance how school was going this past week, I got this response: "Well, all the kids are getting to know me for one thing for sure."

"What is that?" I asked trying to figure out what he could be talking about.

Chance just removed the magnet part of his implants and said "Because of these." He said it like I should have guessed that all along.

Not being sure if this was a positive or negative situation, I pressed for more information.

"Do the kids ask about your implants?" I asked.

"YES! Chance said.

"What do they say?" I asked.

"They ask me what they are."

"And what do you tell them?"

"That I am deaf and with out them I can not hear."

"What do the kids say when you tell them that?" I asked still wondering if this was an annoyance to Chance or just a part of his life that he was comfortable with.

"Wow or oh." Chance replied.

"Then what do they say?" I asked wondering if the implants were opening doors for Chance to meet more kids in 5th grade.

Chance started to laugh. "Sometimes they tell me to take the implants off and then ask me if I can hear them." Chance seemed amused by this so I was not alarmed.

"Some of the kids ask me if I can read lips. Then they have me take the implants off and stand in front of me and say stuff to see if I can tell what they are saying."

"Can you tell what they are saying?" I asked.

Chance threw back his head and laughed. "Yes! Then the kids are like, NO WAY!" Chance is an excellent lip reader and I pity anyone that goes up against him.

"One girl came up behind me and I said, "I know you are there because I can feel you walking on the floor." Chance said obviously delighted that he had been able to detect her.

Then Chance said in wonder, "I now know that I can feel noises from the ground!"

"Are the kids nice when they ask you about your implants?" I asked trying to stay neutral but also wanting to know if anyone was harassing Chance about his implants."

"Yes." Chance said. "The kids don't stare at me at this school like they used to at my old school." Chance said with obvious relief.

"The kids would stare at you at your old school?" I asked surprised. I even verified with Chance that the kids at this new school did not stare at him like the kids at his old school.

"The kids at your old school stared more? The kids at your old school saw implants and hearing aids all of the time because lots of kids wore them there."

Chance shrugged, "I don't know why they stared but they did."

Chance obviously feels like he got stared at more at his old school. The only thing I can figure at the old school is sometimes the deaf kids were pulled from their regular classes to go for language help from a School for the Deaf teacher and they usually ate lunch together. Maybe the kids were looking in curiosity at the deaf kids who congregated together at lunch etc. and since they were different from them, they would look over in curiosity. Chance had great friends at his old school both deaf and hearing. I don't think it was mean spirited that Chance felt kids stared more. But is is intriguing that he doesn't feel that way at his new school. There are only two deaf kids at the new school and both wear implants. Maybe they just blend in more with all of the other kids.

Chance does not seem annoyed at all that the kids are asking about his implants which is good. My experience has been that kids are just curious and once they are told about the implants, they just go with the flow. Kids just want to know what they are which is natural.

I did ask Chance's brother who sees Chance quite a bit at school if the kids were nice to him or if anyone was mean because of the implants. His response was,"Not at all."

So, I guess Chance is educating the school about implants and just how gosh darn good he is at lip reading:)

Growing pains

2010-09-26T23:15:00.000-06:00

Chance has been in 5th grade for about 2 weeks now. It has been a bit of an adjustment for him. Not academically, but socially. Since Chance started out the year in 4th grade, he got into a little comfort zone. One of his deaf friends was in 4th grade with him and they were overjoyed to have been reunited. There was also a boy from our neighborhood that Chance knew and sat with. Plus, Chance had begun to know many of the kids in 4th grade during the short time he was there. He had some homies that he was comfortable with.

Since this is a charter school, the kids are not kids from the same neighborhood. There are kids from 4 or 5 different cities that attend this school, so when Chance moved up to 5th grade, he was with kids he had never seen before in his life. He started to struggle a little with the fact that he did not know any of the 5th graders. He even started to get teary eyed in the morning when it was time to go to school as opposed to running out the door to ride his bike to school. So, we had some talks about how sometimes new things are hard, but they get better once you get used to them. Realizing that the kids in 5th grade would also have started to find people they were comfortable with during the past few weeks of school, we also gave Chance some Mike and Ike candies and told him to give two candies to two or three 5th grade kids he did not know and introduce himself. The first day, Chance gave some candies to his brother and his brothers friend. Good sharing, wrong people:)'

Now that it has been almost two weeks, Chance says it is getting better in 5th grade. He is not as anxious about going to school and he actually gave me a thumbs up on Friday when I asked him how school had been.

Chance actually will be more social having moved to 5th grade because he'll get to know two grades of kids, having gotten to know some of the 4th graders. When I have been at the school, I have heard kids call out as we walk down the hall,"Hi Chance!" Many of these kids are 4th graders who talk to Chance in the hall and I am sure that 5th grade students will start conversing with Chance in the hall as well as time goes on.

I would like to give a shout out to Michael who goes by Donovan. This sweet boy who is a 5th grader, came and put him arm around Chance one of the mornings that he was teary eyed outside the classroom standing with me and asked him if he wanted to walk into class with him. Thank you Michael who goes by Donovan!

When Chance is feeling emotional, he also doesn't want to go up in front of the class to give the teacher his FM system. I can understand that, so we have just been working on getting Chance comfortable in 5th grade.

Chance's sweet brother has been looking out for him as well and even took a football to school so he could gather a group of kids together to play a game. He made sure to get several 5th graders so that Chance could meet more of them :)

Things are looking up. Chance is getting more comfortable in school AND he got a locker like the junior high kids. Now he feels extra special :) And I am hearing of new kids each day that Chance is getting to know.

Like Madison and Cody.

Things are looking better.

Inservicing the teachers on the FM system

2010-09-19T23:05:00.000-06:00

So I went into Chance's school with two consultants from The School for the Deaf to give an in service to the teachers that work with Chance and the other little boy at the school who uses an implant to hear.

It was just an awareness sort of thing to let the teachers know simple things that can be done that make a big difference to kids who wear implants. For example, not talking into the white board when writing on it, but instead facing the class when giving instruction. Or when kids answer questions, having the teacher repeat what was said such as,"Jimmy said conifers are trees that don't shed their leaves in the fall." These steps are especially important right now since many classrooms in Chance's school are large and combined, as the school is waiting for dividers to be put in. Clarifying who just said what is a great help to implant users who may not hear a child from the back of the room.

I told the teachers about the FM system and showed them how it works and demonstrated how the microphone piece would be worn as they will be wearing a headset. The teachers were very helpful and when I opened it up for questions, I was impressed with their concern about what they could do to make sure the kids were getting what they needed. For example, the chorus teacher asked about music and implants. I told him that it usually takes kids with implants longer to learn the words and tune to a song and so he asked if it would help if he sent the songs home that they would be working on. I told him that would be very helpful and today he sent me an email listing the songs they would be working on for the next bit and the words. I am very grateful for that.

I told the teachers that they did not need to be afraid to teach these boys, that they had been in school for several years in regular classrooms and just taking a few steps would make all of the difference. I also told them that we as parents were more than willing to talk to teachers about questions or work with them to solve any problems that may arise. I feel good about the meeting and feel that the teachers want to help these kids with implants succeed.

So after the afternoon meeting with the teachers, I went home and Chance and I went over the FM system and how Chance would give the headset to each teacher and told him he would need to remember to get the headset from each teacher as he moved from class to class. Then the next morning, I went to Chance's first class with him to help him get comfortable with the FM system and to make sure that it worked like it should. It actually didn't work like it should much to my consternation. I ended up taking it home and finally realized that one part of it was not charged all of the way. This little FM system needs LOTS AND LOTS of time to charge we have realized. It needs to charge all night and then some so we have to get Chance in the habit of putting it right onto the charger as soon as he gets home from school.

The next day I headed back to the school and helped Chance set up the system and he said that it is helping him to hear better in class. Except P.E. First of all, it is hard to run around while wearing the equivilant to a wide cell phone hooked onto your pants, and number two, the gym is just one huge spot for noise to bounce up down around and through. I don't think the FM system would do much good in there. But Chance is used to PE class, he watches the other kids and the teachers try to make sure they give instrucions on how to play games etc. before all of the kids are running around the gym making all kinds of noise with both their voices and their bodies:)

Reflections at a Time of Triumph

2010-09-13T00:25:00.002-06:00

I met with the academic principal of Chance's school this week and we talked about Chance's test scores from the end of last year. Chance scored as a 4th grader heading for 5th grade although technically on paper he is in 4th grade this year.

Chance learned to hear again twice during his younger years. He got hearing aids at age 3 and learned to hear and respond using those. Then, three days before his 6th birthday, he received his first implant. Six months later he received his second implant and so he learned to hear again using implants.

Due to the changing in his hearing devices and his late diagnosis of severe to profound hearing loss, Chance is a grade behind the other kids his chronological age. He did not repeat a grade, but had a year in between kindergarten and first grade where he was in a class of deaf children who built vocabulary and other things to get them ready to mainstream in a regular classroom as opposed to a School for the Deaf classroom. It was the right thing to do at the time and we have never questioned the decision.

Chance's only delay has always been in language and things relating to hearing. He has been closing the gap in his language delay and last year I home schooled him and we were able to work one on one in language arts. Chance was a joy to teach with a drive to learn and a quest to do his best in all he did. As I taught Chance, he was working at a 4th grade level last year and we realized that Chance had developed academically to the point where he was level with his peers that were his age and could possibly now go into 5th grade. So we had him tested at the end of last year and he tested as a child who was LEAVING 4th grade not entering into 4th grade. We realized that this was his shot to catch up to his peers who were entering 5th grade if ever there was a chance.

When we started this journey, it was not important to us that Chance be in the same grade as his peers his age. We only wanted what was best for Chance and after learning to hear again twice, it was best for him to have that extra year to learn vocabulary and get help with language. Some parents of deaf kids were really bothered by the prospect of their child being a grade behind their peers their same age. We knew that Chance needed that extra year.

Now the testing has shown that Chance is ready for 5th grade. I get teary eyed thinking about that.

It is hard to adequately explain to someone who has not experienced it just what has gone into the past several years since we found out that Chance was deaf. The unknowing, the long road to get him what he needed and the uncertainty. When we first found out Chance was deaf, no one dared tell us anything concrete about his future. "How well would he be able to hear with hearing aids?" They didn't know.

We sat through several years of IEP meetings (Individualized Education Plan) where Chance tested at least 2 years behind his peers his age in language. That was to be expected we were told. Chance's first goal in preschool was to respond and turn when his name was called by the teacher.

We went through years of weekly therapy where we were taught how to help Chance develop language. We went to seminars, read books and talked to other parents of deaf children. We spent 6 years of our lives engaged to a great degree in deaf related activities.

I stayed up late nights, after the kids finally went to bed, searching the internet for books that would inspire Chance to want to read, as when he first learned, he got easily frustrated. In the past, deaf kids have notoriously had difficulty in reading past a certain point. I did not want that for Chance. I remember sitting with him many nights as he became frustrated with reading and I would work out deals with him such as he read one page and I read the next page. Chance went into a reading recovery program and I sat with him each night as he read the assigned books and attended the class once a week with Chance where I learned ways to help him with his reading. I volunteered in Chance's classroom each year and watched to see how he was doing. I kept up a dialogue with his teachers and we worked as a team to help Chance succeed.

We maxed out on the benefit of hearing aids and looked into implants. Professionals thought the implants would help Chance but no one could tell us to what degree. One medical intern told me the night before the surgery of the second implant not to expect too much. Hah! What did he know?

Chance learned to hear again with implants and we did more language therapy and learned how to help Chance basically learn to hear with the implants.   I had a box in the pantry dedicated to Chance and helping him learn to hear. Just little things like magnets, a white board and various other things to make learning language a little fun.

Chance continued to close the gap between where his peers were and where he was in language. And now, 4 years after getting the second implant, the academic principal at his charter school has looked over the testing with other school officials and deemed that Chance can move up to 5th grade. He starts officially tomorrow. Chance has not only overcome his language obstacles but caught up to his hearing peers in many ways. He is amazing and few people will ever realize just what it took for him to get here. He is incredible and has been the recipient of nothing less than a true miracle in his life. We have prayed and sought guidance from a power higher than ours to help guide us in our journey with Chance. We know that those prayers have been heard and Chance has been watched over. I believe that our prayers are always heard, though they are not always answered the way we think they should be. We have had many bumps in our journey where the way we thought things should work out, the way it seemed to make sense for things to work out, didn't happen and we had to change course.

We'll be watching to ensure that Chance is ready and thriving in 5th grade. It will be a change for him and he may have some things he needs to work on, but he has reached his goal. He has been telling us for the past while that he wanted to be in 5th grade like his friends his age. It did not bother him until fairly recently that he was a grade behind. He has worked hard and pushed himself and now here he is where he wanted to be.   Like I said, we will be watching and helping him to make sure that he is doing well in 5th grade.

I am emotional when I think about it. We have reached a milestone in our years-long journey for Chance to hear. There are many years left to go, but today we celebrate that years of effort by all of us have yielded what can only be termed a miracle. A miracle that was helped along by dedicated teachers, professionals in audiology, us as his parents, Chance himself and most notably by our Father in Heaven.

One thing leads to another....

2010-09-12T23:34:00.000-06:00

It all started with a decision to go look at the just-beginning-to-emerge fall foliage in the mountains. That led us to a roaring little stream where many people stood on a bridge watching as a garter snake tried to cross over to the other side. That led to Chance and his brother feeling sorry for the snake and getting a large branch to aid the snake in getting across so that he wouldn't drown.

Which led to a nice doctor who had been watching the snake and then the boys walking over and kindly explaining that the plants they were standing in to rescue the snake were stinging nettle. Stinging nettle is a little rascal of a plant that lives in our mountains and does pretty much what it's name implies. It stings.

Chance and his brother were rubbing their legs when they climbed up the bank of the stream. As the doctor good naturedly said, "It's a lesson in nature!"

Thankfully, the boys did not get that much contact with the stinging nettle. Just a little brush on a small part of their legs. It could have been so much worse.

I explained to Chance what the doctor had said since Chance had been busy sitting on the path rubbing his legs while the doctor knelt down to tell the boys that those plants by the streams edge were stinging nettle.

"Really?" Chance asked.

"That is why your leg is annoying you." I explained.

"Oh!" Chance said his eyes getting big.

For the rest of our walk along the trails, Chance would point out various plants and ask,"Is that stinging nettle?" The stinging nettle had been mixed in with other plants at the streams edge so Chance didn't get a good look at what exactly it looked like. We tried to show him some so he would know what to avoid in the future but we couldn't find anymore as we hiked down the trail.
You know, I think that doctor was right. This HAS been a lesson in nature that the boys won't soon forget. Now we just have to let Chance know what stinging nettle actually looks like so he can avoid it in the future.

Chance starts a new school

2010-09-06T00:27:00.001-06:00

Chance is attending a new charter school this year near our home. Due to the fact that it is not wired for FM systems, and the fact that the kids move from room to room for each class, Chance is going to get an opportunity to be learn to advocate for himself. Chance will be wearing an FM system starting next week, but he still will have to let teachers know if he is not hearing what is going on.

During the back to school open house, we got to go around and meet all of the different teachers. We told them a bit about implants, and also what Chance would need such as sitting near the front when there are many kids and being close to the teacher when the class goes outside. We have not experienced an FM system before, so we'll see how well it helps Chance in school. The history teacher told Chance just to get up and move his chair to wherever he needed to in the room if he could not hear what was going on. I like that. Chance can just move himself to where he needs to be if he can't hear.

Each child has a mentor teacher that they can go to if they have questions or have a problem. Chance's mentor teacher is the art teacher. And he wears a hearing aid. I thought that was brilliant of the school to hook Chance up with a teacher who wears a hearing aid and would thus have an understanding of what it is like to not be able to hear things. Especially in the lunchroom and during assemblies.

Chance has been in school for 3 days now and I asked him if he was hearing alright in class. He said yes, but there was one class he could not hear the teacher sometimes. I asked him what class that was and he said he couldn't remember. Hmmmmm. I told him to write down what class he could not hear in as well when it was over so he could remember and we could see if we could do something to help him hear better.

The FM system that he will be borrowing will be here on Wednesday. I am kind of excited to see how it works for Chance. Chance will have what they call a "loop" which will hang around his neck and hook onto his belt. It can go under his clothes so that it is not as visible. I don't know that Chance would be bothered by having the FM system be visible. The teacher will wear a little microphone that hooks onto their shirt that will transmit to the loop Chance is wearing.

It is all kind of exciting to see how Chance likes the FM system. Hopefully, it will work for him and he will like it.

On another note, I followed the boys as they rode their bikes to school to see the best route to take and see how long it takes them to make the trip. At one point on the way home, the boys veered off and crossed the street. I honked the horn of the van to get their attention so that I could talk to them and remind them that we were timing how long it takes to ride to and from school so we shouldn't make any diversions. Between the road noise, the fact that I was behind him and Chance had a bike helmet on, he did not respond to the horn.
I thought, "Chance is not going to hear if a car behind him honks? Are you serious?" There is one stretch of road that has a really narrow shoulder that the boys ride on for several yards. I don't like the fact that Chance did not seem to hear me honking. What if a car behind him honks at him and he does not hear it?

I will be testing out how well Chance hears a horn from behind during the next week. I want to know if this was a one time incident, or if Chance does not hear horns coming up behind him very well. I think that without the bike helmet, he would probably hear better, but the helmet protects him in case he falls. I'll be doing some investigating to see what Chance hears this week.

Adorable...

2010-08-29T00:12:00.000-06:00

Chance's vocabulary is expanding and he is trying out new words in sentences on a regular basis. Sometimes he uses the words just right and sometimes it is not usually a way the word would normally be used, but he is learning more all the time. One episode of Chance using a "new to him" word occurred this past week when Chance exclaimed:

"I found the most ADORABLE shoes that I want for my play shoes!" Chance told his dad as he walked into the kitchen.
Chance's dad was in the kitchen making dinner and Chance was expressing his desire to own above shoes while reaching for some food.
With a matter of fact voice, Chances dad said, "Boys don't usually use the word adorable to describe things. Mom would, but boys usually don't use adorable. They may say something like awesome shoes, or cool shoes instead."
Chance said,"Really?" Then just shook his head as if to say OK and walked off with his dinner.
Chance's brother came up into the kitchen where his dad was cooking and said in a low voice,"I'm glad you told him that dad because boys really don't use the word adorable."

Chance may always miss this....

2010-08-22T23:49:00.000-06:00

Chance's brother had a late, late birthday party where he took several friends and his brother Chance to a minor league baseball game.

The boys all went down on the field with Chance's brother while the stadium sang a birthday salute. Chance had his sunglasses confiscated by the owl mascot who just couldn't quite get the sunglasses to fit over his eyes which were as Chance put it,"huge!"

A good time was also had by all as they tried to catch foul balls in a field behind the first-base line.

On the way home, the boys all sang to the radio. As each song would begin, the boys would hear just one or two notes and then break into song in unison. But not Chance.

Chance would look around like,"How do they all know what to sing?"

Even after notes 6,7, 8, and 9, Chance wasn't identifying the songs. This may always be a struggle for Chance. He does not catch onto songs as soon as people with out implants, and it takes him more time to identify what song comes on. He loves music and he does learn the words after time. His chorus teacher said that he had good rhythm and she pointed out that not all of her kids with normal hearing had that.

This is not a huge tragedy. Chance can hear so well, but he is deaf, and his hearing is not perfect. We certainly don't mind his music delay. He may though, especially as he gets older and music becomes more and more important to kids his age. I hope he does not let it bother him too much.

Maybe we'll have to teach him to say something like,"Hey, I may not know as many songs as well as you do, but I have learned to hear again after going deaf. I'm doing just fine!" He could even say something along the lines of,"My mother thinks I am fabulous even if I don't catch every song on the radio. She told me so:)

Chance and wake boarding

2010-08-15T23:11:00.006-06:00

A few weeks ago, we had a big family outing at the lake with grandparents, cousins, and various aunts and uncles. One uncle generously brought his boat so that we could engage in water activities like water skiing, wake boarding and other various fun water sports.

Chance decided that he wanted to try wake boarding for the first time with his brother so our family headed out to the middle of the lake to give it a go. Since Chance does not wear his implants in the water and they were snuggled down in a bag on shore, he could not hear anything so his brother went first to show him how it was done.

Chance is a good learner by just observing, but even still, Chance's dad sat on the edge of the boat motioning and signing to Chance on how this activity was done. Chance nodded and got ready to succeed as his brother had done.

Chance was SO close to getting up several times, but like his mother, he didn't quite make it this time but is highly anticipating the opportunity to nail it next year:)

When we got to back to shore, Chance kept repeating a phrase that I did not understand.

Since Chance did not have his implants on, I had to wait a bit before I figured out what he was telling me since he would often say the phrase, and then turn his head so he could not see me asking "What?"

Finally, after looking around for Chance so we could walk up to the bathrooms which were located up the beach and through the parking lot, I asked Chance's dad if he knew what the phrase was that Chance kept repeating.

After repeating what Chance had said, Chance's dad smiled and said,"It means 'I am about to pee myself' in Spanish."

Really? We have taught our son to say I am going to pee myself?? Or should I say, ONE of us taught Chance how to say that? And rather loudly too, since Chance tends to talk louder when his implants are not on.

(Dad's claim of innocence: I had told a story where 'Me meo' is part of the punchline - I just had no idea he had retained the phrase.)

I looked up towards the bathrooms and saw Chance shimming over the sand to get to the bathrooms.

"Does Chance know exactly what he is saying?" I asked.

"I don't know." His dad replied.

Maybe we should clarify how to say "I need to use the bathroom," before Chance takes off his implants near water again :)

How Chance affects the tires we buy...

2010-08-07T22:00:00.000-06:00

Apparently, it was time to buy some new tires for our van. We now know this because one of the front tires was punctured by something lying in the road in our neighborhood and so Chance's dad took it in to be replaced as the tear was not repairable.

While he was there, Chance's dad was shown where all the other tires were worn almost to the steel rims on the side facing the van that we don't usually see. Good thing we got that message now before we had a blow out or something.

Since this was a somewhat unexpected expense, we were going over the options of which tires would do the job well, with out breaking the budget.

We have been going to this tire place for a while and have found them to be very helpful and honest. Chance's dad was shown a set of tires and told that "they will do the job, but they are a different rubber that will generate more road noise in the van."

More road noise in the van? That could be a big deal for Chance. So, we opted for the tires that were $150.00 more to maintain a quieter ride. We figure Chance is worth it:)

I get by with a little help from my friends

2010-07-30T16:26:00.003-06:00

Since Chance's new mapping a few weeks back, he seems to be missing more when we are talking. I notice it and his dad notices it. Chance is adamant that he hears just fine, it is just quiet sometimes or there is too much other noise in the room.

Hmmmmm.

So today, I told Chance that I was going to ask his two best friends in the neighborhood if they thought Chance was hearing as well as he usually does. I saw the three boys outside riding their scooters and called Chance over.

"I am going to ask your friends if they think you are hearing as well as you usually do." I told him.

"Ok!" Chance said surprised but not bothered.

So I called his friends over to ask them and Chance stood by with a little smile on his face.

"Does Chance seem to hear you as well as he always has?" I asked his friends.

Chance looked from one friend to the other.

Once shook his head yes and the other one said,"Ya."

Chance's dad happened to walk out while we were having this little chit chat and said,"Does he ask what more often or seem not to hear you?"

"Only if I talk really quiet but that is the way it always is."

"Chance just got his implants programmed so we wanted to make sure they were working like they needed to," I said.

His friends nodded and then a smiling Chance sped down the driveway with his friends.

Score: Chance 1 Parents 0

Hah! A mamma's revenge

2010-07-26T00:33:00.000-06:00

So Chance did that thing again where takes off the part of the implants attached to the magnet and just lets them hang there flopping on the sides of his face. This means he can not hear a stinking thing. He did not want to listen to what I was saying so he released his ability to hear.

This ability to quit hearing at will disturbs me a bit as a mother. Chance does not do it much, but the fact that the capabilities are there is, well....disturbing. And it is not something that I want to become a regular occurrence. What if Chance goes through an awkward teen stage of not thinking we're cool (like that could happen) and he doesn't want to listen to us so he just unattaches his implants on a regular basis?

Today I fought back. Chance unhooked his implants and they were there dangling by the side of his head as he looked down.(we want to make sure he could not read my lips either apparently).

So, I took the implants off of his head. How many moms can take their kids ears off? I wasn't angry, Chance is a good sport and laughs easily so I figured he would appreciate the joke yet get the point at the same time. This caused Chance to look up. Then I calmly just said," If you are not going to use them, then it is my turn." And I put them on my ears and walked off.

Chance was soon following behind me saying,"I want them back."

I just replied,"It is my turn to use them since you are not."

Chance was bemused by this and as he called for me to return his implants, a smile would creep onto his face though he tried to hide it sometimes.

I walked down the hall and into the bathroom with Chance following close behind me.

I only had the implants on for a few minutes. But I think those few minutes made Chance realize just how much he missed his implants when they were gone :)

40 minutes too late....

2010-07-19T00:57:00.000-06:00

We just got back from a lovely trip to St. George where we mingled with family, spent a day on the lake and played games.

Chance got to reconnect with cousins and play all weekend long while eating donuts that his uncle brought from his donut shop. Seriously, is there any better vocation an uncle could have than having a donut shop?! Every family gathering that this uncle attends is sure to serve donuts much to the kids' delight.(and the adults too. His donuts are beyond your ordinary variety).

Since traveling to St. George requires packing up the car for a 4 to 4 and a half hour trip with 5 kids, we need to plan to make sure that we have all that we need.

We did our usual run through of grandma's house as we prepared to leave for home.

Swim suits? Check all packed and ready to go.

Tooth brushes? Check. Wait, hold on. We did pack only our tooth brushes right? Some poor cousin will not be toothbrushless tonight when they go to brush because we packed ours and theirs?
Suitcases, pillows, sleeping bags, flip flops, snacks and 5 kids...check.

40 minutes later while driving down the freeway........

"Did you guys remember to get my rechargable battery pack at grandma's?" Chance calls up from the back seat.

Silence. I looked at Chance's dad and he looked at me. Neither one of us took ownership for packing the rechargeable battery packs so that answered the question.

Apparently, no one packed the rechargeable battery packs. The reason Chance was asking was because one of his implants was about to die and needed new batteries.

How unfortunate that none of us thought of this 40 minutes before. Chance had just been complaining that one side of his headphones was not working. Well, at least that problem was solved since Chance would shortly be hearing out of only one ear:)

Thankfully, Chance's aunt who lives about 40 minutes from our house had not left St. George yet, so we made a quick phone call and asked her if she would mind bringing the battery pack with her when she comes home tomorrow. Oh, and not to be pushy or anything, but would she mind putting the battery pack in her car as soon as she got off the phone with us so that she didn't forget it? Luckily, Chance's aunt is really nice and so she agreed.

Chance and his battery pack should be reunited sometime tomorrow. Chance is a little dismayed at the wait, but we are lucky that his aunt is able to bring them to us so soon.

We all learned something from this. First, we need to remember to include the rechargeable battery pack in our list of things to remember on a trip. Two, sometimes using the rechargeable batteries is not all it is cracked up to be and using the disposable kind may well be our best option while on vacation.

We've come a long way baby!

2010-07-10T23:14:00.007-06:00

This week as we sat at the annual 4th of July parade in our area, I was taken by the thought of just how far we have come with Chance since he was first diagnosed as being deaf.

The 4th of July is a big deal in our hearts here at our house and in our area as well. There are big festivities that take place all through out the weeks leading up to the 4th, one of the biggest being the parade. People line up the streets for blocks and blocks. Typically you have to get there really early to get a spot to watch the parade as some people even camp out overnight to save a place.

After we found out that Chance was deaf, taking Chance to places like the parade where there are lots of people and the potential to get separated is greater than normal was quite scary. Chance could not hear real well in places with lots of people not to mention the fact that there were clowns, fireworks and various other activities to distract him. All it would take was for Chance to get interested in something and start walking toward what he saw and he would be lost. We could not call out to him in the crowd because he could not hear us. To make us even more nervous was the fact that we realized that Chance could not tell anyone who we are should he get lost. He could not tell anyone our names. In the beginning he could not tell anyone his own name. With all of this in mind, we were on high alert each time we went out in big groups with Chance. Many times, one of us would just track Chance while the other one worried about the other kids and getting us where we needed to go.

We considered not going to the parade and doing something else instead, but the boys really wanted to go so we came up with a plan of sorts. We wrote down our names, address and phone number on a piece of paper and stuck it in Chance's pocket. We made a big deal about that paper and told Chance that if he could not find us he should find a policeman and give him the paper. Luckily, there are many policemen hanging around the parade, so after we got a spot to sit for the parade, we took Chance for a walk and showed him where policemen were located as there were several on surrounding corners.

We also did not go really early to the parade. We did not want the pressure of tracking Chance for several hours before the parade actually started. Tracking him during the actual parade was going to be enough to keep us busy since he could not hear us and there were literally people 10 and 11 deep on the sidewalks all around us. Plus, one of Chance's hearing aids started having a problem so it was being repaired and we were down to one aid.

Thankfully, some nice people let us sit by them so that we got a spot to watch the parade.

The next year, Chance could hear a little better, but one of his hearing aids wasn't working right so we had to send it to NEW YORK to get it fixed. So again, we were down to one aid over the 4th of July. This time, we found a spot to sit later in the morning as well since we did not want to track Chance for longer than we had to. A lady let us move our blanket in by hers and it seemed all was well, but then during the parade, she wanted her grandkids to be able to lay down, and she got annoyed at us when all of them couldn't. We all scrunched together and tried to make her happy, but she could not be satisfied. She actually got quite mean when I tried to explain to her that Chance was deaf and could not hear and waved her hand at me in an annoyed gesture.

The other people around us seemed annoyed by this woman and her actions towards us and after the parade, several people told us it was a pleasure sitting by us and one family gave the kids some suckers.

Those years are well behind us now. Chance is perfectly capable of finding us or help should we get separated. Part of that come with age, but part of that simply comes because Chance can hear. He can hear!

Yes, we've come along way baby! And thankfully so!

They burn the flag because it gets cold?

2010-07-04T23:03:00.001-06:00

Chance's brother headed off to his first week of scout camp and lucky for us, it was close enough that on the last night, they had a family night. We were fed dinner and got to reunite with our happy yet dirty boys and see what they had been up to for the past week.

Chance will attend scout camp one day himself and he thought the whole camp was great. There was a pond, baby duckings, canoes, tents, firepits and lots and lots of trees.

After dinner, the scouts put on a program for us which included skits, an award ceremony and a touching patriotic segment. The "stage" was outdoors next to the lake with logs for sitting tiered up the hill. I chose a seat for us that was smack in the middle of the arena and close to the stage to give Chance the best odds of hearing what was happening. He laughed at the skits so he obviously got them. He even repeated several of them for his dad in incredible detail when we got home.

As part of the patriotic segment, they talked about how to properly retire a flag, A flag that had flown over an Air Force base was cermoniously disposed of while we all sat watching in silence and quotes were read about the significance of the flag and what it stands for. The arena was silent with a feeling of reference as the flag was tenderly laid to rest by some of the scouts.

Chance sat transfixed watching the ceremony and then he turned to me and whispered,"Why are they doing that to the flag?"

Since the arena was silent with reference, I didn't spend a lot of time explaining why the flag was being retired, I just whispered back,"Because the flag is old."

A look of confusion and concern spread across Chance's face as he leaned back over to me and said in surprise,"Because the flag is cold?!!!"

"OLD" I repeated looking straight at him so he could see my lips.

Chance nodded in that, "Oh, now I get it" way and then we sat in silence enjoying the rest of the ceremony together.

The buzzer on the oven

2010-06-28T22:54:00.000-06:00

Chance was making brownies today as I was in and out of the room. After a while Chance came to me frustrated and said," It has been 32 minutes and it hasn't beeped yet!"

"The buzzer telling you the oven is hot enough?" I asked.

"YES!" Chance replied.

I told him to go ahead and put the brownies in anyway since the oven had had enough time to warm up.
"Maybe I just didn't hear it." Chance said matter-of-factly as he left the room.

So, Chance didn't hear the sound telling him the oven was ready. He seems to hear the buzzer when the items are done cooking. I think they are a little different in sound. Now, I'm curious. I'll have to pay attention and see do some expiriments with Chance to see what he is hearing from the oven.

Chance versus the stink bug

2010-06-28T22:17:00.000-06:00

One of the best things about having boys who are fascinated with bugs is the fact that I now don't feel I should have to mess with any tiny critters who invade my home. And I don't. I call my boys to mess with them. So this morning when I discovered a stink bug in my bedroom, I immediately knew who was going to take care of that potential for offensive smell....Chance.

When I went to find Chance however, he was in the garage getting something out of the van without implants on. No matter. I flagged him down by waving my arms frantically in the doorway until he saw me. Then I put on a dire expression and motioned for him to come. His expression was one of concern as he climbed out of the van and walked over to me. Then I took his arm and led him into the kitchen where I handed him a jar. His look of confusion deepened.

Then I led him to the entrance of my bedroom and pointed to the offending bug. Chance's look of concern vanished and he knelt down to examine the bug. "Is this a stink bug?" Chance asked. I nodded.

"Can they fly?" He asked.

I said I didn't think so.

Then Chance scooped up the stink bug into the jar and the entire episode was over.

I could get these critters by myself but with boys around who find the task fascinating as they get to get up and close with critters, I defer to them:)

Why Chance gets to sit in the bucket seat

2010-06-20T22:54:00.000-06:00

I think we may have quelled the complaint that some of our kids have because Chance always gets to sit in the bucket seat in the middle row of the van instead of the bench in the back that seats three.

Due to an injury incurred while bouncing on a trampoline at a cousin's house, Chance's brother got to sit in the bucket seat in the middle row since it can recline back a little. Chance therefore was regulated to the back seat of the van.

Our conversations on the hour drive home went like something like this:

Mom to Chance's older brother:"Did you actually fall of off the trampoline or did you hit the side of it?"

"I hit the side and then fell off." Was the response.
Chance:"What did he do?"
Mom:"Tell your brother how you got injured."

A little time lapse and then:
Dad:"We need to get home so that I can turn the crock pot down or the meat will burn."
Chance:"What will burn? Dad, what will burn?"
Mom:"Tell Chance what will burn please."

Child from the back seat asks,"When will grandma and grandpa be coming to our house?"
Mom,"They will be to our house in about an hour."
Chance from the backseat,"When are grandma and grandpa coming?"
Mom:"Please tell Chance when grandma and grandpa will be coming."

And later while we sat at a stand still on the freeway........
Dad,"Oh, I see why traffic is moving so slow! We are going down from 4 lanes to 2 lanes because they are fixing some pot holes."
Chance from the back seat,"What? Why are we moving so slow?"
Mom to Chance's older brother,"Turn around and tell Chance that they are fixing potholes in the road and that is why we are moving so slow."

Note to other kids from mom:"You see kids, there IS a good reason that Chance sits in that middle seat. He can not hear everything from the backseat what with the music playing and 7 people making various noises and comments as we drive, and so you have to keep turning around and telling him what is going on:)

Perhaps it was the blinking lights....

2010-06-13T23:56:00.000-06:00

Apparently some vultures made their way into our cul-de-sac the other day. Chance and his friends took this opportunity to prostrate themselves upon the ground and pretend that they were dead. Nothing adds pizazz to your day like being sucked on by a vulture who assumes that you are dead since you are laying so quiet and still on the road.

Except, Chance said that they kept laughing so the vultures never attempted to make a meal out of them.

I personally think it may have been the blinking lights on Chance's implants. The vultures have most likely never eaten someone who's ears were blinking before and found this fact very suspicious.

Oh well. Maybe next time.

"I can hear with out using the t coil!

2010-06-13T23:55:00.000-06:00

I was in the kitchen doing motherly things like loading the dishwasher and wiping off counters when I got a phone call. It was Chance and he was very excited.

"I can hear on this phone without turning my implant to t-coil!" He gushed into the phone.

"Really?" I asked.

"Yes, I can hear you right not and I did not have to use my t-coil."

"That is awesome Chance. Where are you?"

"In the barn in the backyard. We're playing in here. I just wanted to call and tell you I can hear on this phone."

Who would have thought that our little hand-me-down Net10 phone that we use when the kids go somewhere and need a phone to call us would be the one that Chance could hear on the best? And we got it by accident! Friends of ours from out of the country got these little Net10 phones so that they could communicate with each other while in the states, but the phones would not work back in Europe so they gave one to us.

What a great surprise.

The implant takes a ride.....

2010-06-02T23:27:00.000-06:00

Chance has cousins visiting from out of state and so they joined us for a fun day at the zoo today. We watched birds sail overhead, and watched an elephant retrieve and put a hat on his head during the pachyderm show. The weather was just right for a day at the zoo and when the kids saw the carousel everyone wanted to have a turn riding on the zebras, elephants and roosters that were pumping up and down and whirling around in a circle.

Chance took a comfortable seat on a snow leopard next to his cousin. We were in a canyon, and a slight breeze blew....a perfect day to be riding a zoo animal. As "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" played on, Chance's cousin decided to tease Chance and reached over to knock the hat off of his head as they rode. The hat didn't come off, but the implant did. It fell and shattered across the wood platform of the carousel as the music played and the ride turned on. I think I gasped. My sister-in-law said,"I am sorry!"

The operator of the ride who had no idea what he was giving to me, handed me the battery pack part of the implant which had bounced off the wood platform and landed on the ground near his feet. He must have known it belonged to me as I had spontaneously started running along side the carousel when the implant fell off, while Chance held up his arms in a gesture of,"I don't know where it went."

The other part of the implant lay on the wood platform going around and around with everyone else on the ride.

Part of me wanted to shout,"STOP THE RIDE! AN $8000.00 DEVICE IS SITTING ON YOUR PLATFORM AND I HAVE TO GET IT OFF!!!" (wouldn't that have caused a stir as parents and children alike clamored for the opportunity to grow $8000.00 richer)

Instead, I sat mesmerized watching the implant go around and around willing it to stay where it was and not slide down into the nether reaches of the undercarriage of the carousel.

A third thought going through my head was, "insurance is going to cover this right?" I even started writing the letter in my head...........

"Dear insurance people,

My son Chance needs a new implant since half of his old one is under the carousel at the zoo. Thank you for being so understanding and sending us a new one ASAP.

P.S. If you replace this implant as soon as possible so that my son can continue to hear, I will tell everyone I know how great you people are. And frankly, you people in the insurance industry could use some good PR right now. "

When the carousel stopped, the last I had seen of the implant was it sitting on the wooden platform, but it was out of my line of sight at that moment. I was just getting ready to push my way into the throngs of people getting off the carousel when Chance suddenly appeared at my side and took the battery pack out of my hand. Without a care in the world, he put the two parts of the implant back together and smiled to me as he flipped it on and bounced off to join his cousin.

I didn't technically do any extended cardio exercise today, but I think my heart beat hard enough when the implant crashed to the platform and was whirling around and around to qualify as my heart workout for today.

What if I can't hear God talking to me?

2010-05-30T09:06:00.000-06:00

In our house, we really do believe that prayers are answered and that there is a loving Heavenly Father that listens to our prayers and guides our lives. We were having a conversation about God answering our prayers when Chance asked, "What if I do not hear God answer my prayer because I am deaf?"
This is a totally a logical question. At various times we have talked to Chance about how God usually uses quiet means to answer our prayers as opposed to flashy loud means. This apparently got Chance to wondering if he might miss an answer or two since he is deaf and may not hear the quiet answers.
We gently explained that number one, God knows Chance personally, and will not let a little old thing like his being deaf stand in the way of their communication with each other. Number two, we explained that the answers will come as impressions in the mind or stirrings in the heart many times. Things that being deaf will not hinder.
God has had such a hand in helping us to get Chance what he needs along this journey. We have truly experienced miracles along the way. We let Chance know that God is very aware of him and that he will get answers to his prayers and his being deaf will not hinder that in the least.

Mom, what does hearing normal sound like?

2010-05-23T22:25:00.001-06:00

I was in the van with Chance the other night and he was telling me what it was like to use implants to hear. "It is just like normal. Like you don't even have implants on." He explained to me. He had apparently given this process of hearing with an implant a lot of thought."At first they kept falling off, but now it is like they are not even on and I just hear without thinking about them."

Then he hit me with,"Mom, what does normal hearing sound like?"

"Well......" I began letting Chance's question sink in. How do you explain what it is like to hear when you have never even had to think about it....it has always just happened for you?

I have actually given much thought to what it is like to have normal hearing since I have a son who is deaf and does not hear things the same way I do. I have come to really appreciate the ability to hear and the amazing power of our brains and the whole process of hearing.

I have not however experienced being deaf and not able to hear so I was sorting out in my mind how to explain to Chance what hearing was like for me.

"I don't really have to think about hearing too much either." I told Chance."My ears just hear things."

Then I thought of various things that affect my hearing. "Sometimes your ears can become clogged when you have normal hearing. Like if you go swimming, or if you have a cold. It it really annoying when that happens and it makes it so you cannot hear as well."

"Really?" Chance asked enthralled.

"Yes. My ears will clog up sometimes and it drives me crazy." I told Chance. Even though I could not see Chance in the dark of the van, I was picking up on his tone of voice and he was really amazed by this discovery of what can happen when you have normal hearing.

"WOW! I am really lucky!" Chance expressed with awe in his voice."That NEVER happens to me with implants!"

This conversation got me to thinking about what it was like to wear implants. You never get water in your ear when you swim that clogs up your hearing?? I had never thought of that aspect before.
I imagine that colds may have some effect on hearing with implants but I don't know. Do colds have an affect on implant hearing? Or does the implant just bypass the congestion of a cold?

Now I have more questions to add to the question I have had for years now,"What is it like to hear with an implant?"

Bobby pins and magnets

2010-05-16T22:52:00.001-06:00

While sitting in church, I noticed some sort of a projectile leave our row and land a short distance away. I didn't see what the specific object was, and figured maybe I didn't want to know. Thankfully, no one else seemed to be disturbed by the UFO sailing off of our row, so the damage was minimal. Still, Chance looked perturbed and his brother was stifling laughter. A" mom needs to know what is going on moment", if ever there was one as the potential that we would soon be drawing attention to ourselves there on the pew was great.

It turns out, that the UFO was a bobby pin. A quiet item. This was good. Chance's brother had attached the bobby pin to the magnet on Chance's implant to see if it would stick to it. It did, and as everyone knows, this sort of thing is exactly what you should be focusing on during church anyway.

Chance did not appreciate a bobby pin sticking to his implant and had ripped it off and hucked it away from his personage.

Chance's brother was thrilled and amused to see that his little experiment with the bobby pin had worked. Chance was annoyed and unappreciative of the same experiment.

Thankfully, there were no more objects that would stick to a magnet, so the rest of the meeting went smoothly.

Bonding with Chance

2010-05-16T22:31:00.000-06:00

I was laying down getting Chance's little brother to sleep, when Chance came in and lay down by me. He snuggled up to me, and I kissed his head. Across from the bed was a window where you could see the moon shining through the arch of the window. Chance pointed the moon out to me and together we lay enjoying the full moon shining through the window.

Chance did not have his implants in, but we didn't need words to communicate. We just enjoyed the quiet and hunkered down under the blanket.

It was a perfect night with Chance.

Macbeth at Kids to Work

2010-05-03T23:25:00.006-06:00

Chance had the opportunity to go to work with his dad on "take your kids to work day." Chance loves to go to work with his dad, and who could have known that going to work on this particular day would have involved acting out part of the story of "Macbeth?"

It was kind of one of those unplanned impromptu things that you just go with when you get there. Chance even got a speaking part!(he is the one in the green striped shirt kind of bending over).

With about 200 kids showing up that morning, the day was set up with a common "show" then going to various rooms across the company's campus to be introduced to various potential careers in short breakout classes in smaller groups, many of which (ie Facilities Management) are related to the company, others (ie Reptiles or FBI) are with invited local experts.

So, back to the main story - the opening "show" is highlighting one career that most would not think accociated with his Dad's company, a technology company: Acting (for stuff like trade show clips, commercials, etc.) So one of the actor employees and his associate did a good fun session with the kids, helping them act out a condensed, more comical, form of Macbeth. Of course, when they asked for volunteers to participate, nearly every child's hand went up. They selected about 12 participants, after which everybody not chosen was bummed. After a few minutes, however, they mentioned the three witches in the story, and announced that they needed three participants that could give a good witch's scoul. Well, making faces is something that Chance does very well, and he was not disappointed. He was immediately selected for the part, which did require some reading and repeating of lines. Chance did very well, and beamed with delight in being able to participate.

Later in the day, Chance and his brother, sister, and Dad were waiting for the last, full-group, show to start (a phenomenal marrionette show by a former Hollywood puppeteer). While the kids were talking with other kids (not sitting right next to him), Chance's Dad overheard one dad in front of him respond to a question from another dad: "I think those help him hear." Chance's Dad realized that they were talking about Chance, and was able to confirm that yes, in fact, Chance was deaf and those funny looking things he wore helped him to hear. One of the dads was sceptical - he had seen - and even heard - Chance participating all day long and was amazed that he was deaf. "You wouldn't know that he was deaf from hearing him," The surprised dad replied.

Kind of wish I there to see Chance being a witch. I bet he did a great job with those facial expressions.

Don't laugh at me....

2010-05-03T22:29:00.000-06:00

Have you ever seen the old Aunt Jamima commercials where good old Aunt Jamima has her head wrapped in a scarf or neckerchief? Or perhaps you've seen some motorcycle dude while driving down the road who has a neckerchief wrapped around his head? Or, even better to describe what happened at our house, have you ever seen pictures of say a Russian peasant woman who has a scarf wrapped around her head with just her face showing? Now picture Chance's face instead of the Russian peasant woman's.

The kids and I were all in the kitchen when we heard the roll of thunder telling us the forcasted storm had arrived. It was at this moment that the kids all remembered that they had set up a tarp in the backyard with blankets underneath that they needed to run out in the rain and save.

The kids all scattered to grab their shoes, and Chance ran to the back door saying,"Don't laugh at me. I have to cover my implants." And when I turned to look, there stood Chance with a red bandana wrapped around his face and tied under his chin.

To their credit, his siblings did not laugh at him, but instead they all ran outside together to save their tarp hideout.

Chance looks kind of cute as a Russian peasant woman I must say.

Memory lane........

2010-05-03T00:17:00.000-06:00

The local chapter of the Alexander Graham Bell Association held it's annual speech fair and the deaf and hard of hearing kids were in good form.

Chance was slated to sing a song that he learned in chorus this year, and was scheduled to perform toward the end of the night.

As I sat there listening to kids ages 2 to teenagers performing, it was a little like a trip down memory lane. First there were the preschool kids who had just begun their journey to hear. They were so little and cute. Some of them could barely say their names right. That had been our little Chance. Out of all the sounds in the speech banana, the "ch" in his name proved to be a challenge for a while for Chance.

Then came the slightly older kids. They were not as nervous and some had no issue performing in front of the over 300 people who attended. Chance had not been nervous about performing when he was that age either.

Then there were the kindergarten kids. They looked confident and sang their hearts out. Chance received his first implant at the end of kindergarten. His confidence in his ability to hear soared after that.

When Chance's old class got up to perform, Chance literally sat at the edge of his seat. There were his peers that he had gone to school with for 5 years. For the first time, he was not performing with them. They all looked great.

When the teenagers got up to perform, and they talked about how they were on the honor roll at school, or running on the track team or how they loved to dance, (dance on a team requires music, which requires hearing), I thought about how Chance will be up there someday, fully capable to do what ever his passions dictate.

This speech fair was a great source of hope and determination in the beginning. We would see these kids perform and look at our little boy and think,"Hey! He is going to be able to do things that all kids do regardless of his deafness! Look at these kids! They are amazing!"

I remember almost dragging my parents over to talk to one of the teachers who was deaf, just so that they could talk to her and see how much Chance was still capable of, despite the diagnosis of deafness.

Our families were quite startled to find out Chance was deaf. It came out of the blue and no one knew what the possibilities were. That deaf teacher, and those deaf kids performing, showed just what the possibilities were. Chance WOULD be able to read poetry one day and dance to music. And say the 'Ch' in the beginning of his name.

I also realized how much I cared about several of the parents of those deaf kids. We have been through the process together. Shared the same concerns, had the same worries and experienced the same triumphs as our kids literally learned to hear. The parents of these kids are amazing. Their dedication and perseverance is inspiring. Some of the kids have had different challenges besides just the deafness and their parents have been there lighting the way for them.

AND THE KIDS! These kids are amazing! They are smart, they are determined and they are capable. It makes my hear swell to watch them.

These deaf kids and their parents will be interconnected with us forever.

Its' not over until the deaf kid sings.....

2010-04-25T23:08:00.005-06:00

Chance has been in chorus this past year and has really enjoyed singing. He has had a good teacher and she has taught the kids a lot.

Chance's brother is in chorus with him and together with the other kids they have sung in at the mall, for the school and for the parents.

Chance decided to sing one of the songs he learned in chorus for the Alexander Graham Bell Speech Fair this year. It is entitled,"Be Kind to Your Parents."

Since Chance has been singing this song since January, we were confident that he would be able to sing it during the fair.

When we got together with the teacher and friend who was going to play this song, we quickly realized that for this particular song, the piano doesn't really give you the melody. The piano is more of an accompaniment and does not provide the melody. This proved to be a bit of a challenge for Chance. In chorus class, the kids had performed to a CD that, while it didn't have the melody, it was what he was familiar with; plus he had 120 other kids helping with the melody.

Since the performance was in less than a week, I tried to figure out how to help Chance with the melody. He has the words down pat and he had the rhythm. He had always had the other kids in the chorus to back him up with the melody and now, he would be expected to carry it alone.

I had the idea that maybe Chance's brother could sing the song with Chance to help him with the melody during the performance, but was a bit afraid that Chance would feel I didn't think he could do it alone, or that his brother would be stealing his thunder. I broached the idea with Chance and he eagerly nodded his head in agreement that his brother sing with him.

Chance's brother readily agreed and together they practiced with the piano. At the last minute, we were able to get the CD that the kids used in chorus and Chance seemed relieved by this fact.

The singing number was not a duet in the traditional sense, it was more of a support. Chance's brother just sang quietly next to Chance to help him stay on track with the melody.

When Chance took the stage, he introduced himself, gave the title of the song and said his brother was going to sing with him. Then he said,"I am going to sing now."

Chance's brother sang quietly beside him, happily letting Chance shine. As a mother, it filled my heart to the brim.

THOSE parts........

2010-04-18T22:19:00.000-06:00

Chance and I were sitting at the table talking grammar. The assignment was for Chance to look up words in the dictionary and see if they were verbs, nouns, adjectives etc.

Chance was looking down at the words he would be looking up as I was reading more of the assignment and that was when I heard the giggle.

Chance repeated one of the words and then he giggled some more and closed his eyes.

"Do you know what that word means?" I asked Chance as the thought dawned on me that Chance was confusing the word in the assignment with a slang word for a certain male body part.

Chance clasped his hand over his mouth and nodded yes.

"What does it mean?" I asked trying to make sure that I knew what was going through his head.

With a somber expression, Chance informed me,"You don't want to know."

Chance was trying to protect my innocence. What chivalry.

He was protecting me from a word that did not mean what he thought it meant but was a close cousin to the word he thought it was.

I did not want to make Chance feel embarrassed. I told him what the actual slang word for his anatomy was, and then he said,"Oh ya! It sounds kind of like the other word." He replied sheepishly. I agreed that the two words sounded alike.

Then I asked him what the actual word was for this particular body part. Chance gave me a few more slang words giggling and laughing so hard that I could not help but join him.

We came to a consensus on what the actual name was and Chance sayed,"Oh ya!"

I told him that he would hear many many names for that particular body part over the years but that we did not need to use all of them.

My boy now hears the slang phrases used by other kids and is learning all kinds of words that we don't use at home.

Who could have imagined this day would come?!

So, now Chance knows SEVERAL words for his male body parts. These are some of the things you learn by age 9 going on 10 I guess. Hopefully, these are words that don't need to be used all that often by boys age 9 going on 10:)

"I am so lucky..."

2010-04-12T23:41:00.000-06:00

"I am so lucky to have implants and be deaf!" This is the phrase I heard while typing on the computer.

"Ahhhh! Chance is grateful for his implants and is glad to be able to hear!" I thought.

However, when I witnessed the scene of what caused Chance's expression of luck, I saw that he didn't actually have his implants on. The magnet parts were dangling from his head and he was looking down at his brother whom he could no longer hear. A big broad smile on his face.

Chance's brother just looked up at him from the floor unable to convince Chance of whatever it was he was trying to convey.

I think Chance won that one. One point for Chance.

What brothers are for

2010-03-28T22:20:00.000-06:00

Taking advantage of the beautiful weather that we are having, Chance got to spend the day at the park with siblings and friends from out of town.

It was a big park and Chance enjoyed being able to explore the area and took a walk around a little pond looking for fish and other critters that may live there.

Next to the pond was a good sized hill, and as every kid instictively knows, if there is a hill, you should somersault down it as fast as you can go. Chance's brother led the way, veering off to the right a little, but all in all, he made a successful run down the hill going end over end. Chance watched his brother, and then began his own descent down the hill. His dad and I sat watching at the bottom of the hill, remembering back to days of yore when we too looked at a hill and our first thought was to fling our bodies down the hill end over end.

As Chance began his descent veering slightly to the right, his dad turned to me and said, "His implants are going to pop off." As if on cue, we watched as Chance, stopped mid roll and headed back up the hill, his nose in the grass looking for his implant. We were just getting ready to call out to Chance to tell him to put his implants in his pocket until he was at the bottom of the hill, when Chance's brother appeared at his side. He held out his hands for the implants and Chance handed them over to him. Chance's brother then ran with the implants to the bottom of the hill where Chance was successfully reunited with them when his run was over.
Thank goodness for brothers. What would we do with out them?

Neck kisses

2010-03-22T23:49:00.000-06:00

We were driving down the freeway the other night, when Chance's little brother started talking about a birthday party that he had recently attended. The party had been for a little girl so Chance's brother was talking about what he gave her for a present.

Suddenly, I hear Chance from the back seat say, "A WHAT?" So I repeated what his brother had said.

After several more attempts by both me and Chance's brother to tell him what the present was, I turned off the radio and told Chance, "HE GAVE HER A NECKLACE."

"OH!" Chance said, "I thought you said, HE GAVE HER A NECK KISS AND I WAS LIKE, WHAT THE HECK!"

Then, with as much seriousness as I could muster, I said, "Yes, Chance. From now on, when any of you go a to girl's birthday party, you are giving neck kisses for a present. That is what we are giving out this year for birthdays. "

There was silence from the back seat and then Chance in a startled voice says,"WHAT? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?"

Apparently at age 9, giving a girl a neck kiss is a really bad thing.

"NO WAY!" Chance said with complete conviction.

So, if you are a girl, and you are having a birthday party and Chance does not come, it is because he is deathly afraid of giving you a neck kiss. Don't take it personally.

The funeral

2010-03-22T23:27:00.000-06:00

Last week one of Chance's really good little friends lost her dad to a sudden heart attack. Chance and this little girl started out in preschool together and it has just been this year that they not been in the same class. She is deaf as well and wears an implant. Chance has not seen her for a while since they are not in the same class this year, but when they were reunited, it was as if they had never been parted.

We were at the viewing waiting in line when Chance cocked his head and said,"I hear her somewhere around here!" I could hear her too and was looking around to find her.

I wasn't sure how she would be feeling since she was at her own dad's viewing, and I wasn't sure how Chance would be feeling either once we got to the front of the line. When they saw each other, they hugged and then Chance was whisked away from me. She introduced him to her aunts, uncles, cousins and grandparents. She led him to the many displays around the room that depicted aspects of her dad's life. By the time I got to the front of the line, I was being introduced as Chance's mom. Some of the family expressed that they were grateful that Chance was there to be with his friend.
The most touching moment came when I watched the two of them at the casket, both peering down at a man that Chance had spent time with as he played at his friends house through the years.

"It's kind of sad." She said to Chance.

"Yeah." Chance replied.

"He looks different huh?" She asked

"Yeah, he does look different." Chance responded.

They both sat there and looked in the casket for another few seconds and then they were off again, arms linked.

I was glad that Chance was able to be with his little friend during such a difficult time. I was also very touched as I realized that these two kids who had started out together in a preschool where they were literally learning how to talk and express themselves, were now going around the room talking to people as Chance was introduced to all of the relatives. We ended up staying until the end of the viewing as Chance and his little friend were inseperable.

She kept asking if we were coming to the funeral. She was going to play a piano piece and wanted Chance to be there. I asked Chance when we got to the van if he wanted to attend the funeral and he said that he did. We went to the funeral and we listened as a great man was given his last respects.

We know at our house the dedication that it takes to help a child learn to hear and this man and his wife have done a great job with their little daughter. When their insurance company would not pay for the implant, they started fund raising for the money themselves so that their daugter would have the opportunity to hear. May he rest in peace.

Dad will be so embarrassed of me!

2010-03-18T23:27:00.001-06:00

"Dad will be so embarrassed of me!" I had just found Chance leaning up against a wall where he was panting for breath.

We were not at home and Chance had been dashing around with a friend, so my first thought was to panic a little inside.

Oh dear. If daddy who was not present was going to be embarrassed of him, what should I be seeing as I was the parent in charge at the moment?

I could not see any obvious sign of misconduct and nothing looked broken.

"Embarrassed of you?" I asked getting ready to tell Chance that the term was,"embarrassed by me, not embarrassed of me."

"Ya! Because of I have Dove chocolate!"

That would explain the dark substance in Chance's mouth.

Dove chocolate happens to be one of Chance's dad's favorite foods. Infact, Chance's dad thinks chocloate is a food group, but I digress.

"Daddy will be JEALOUS of you? I offered.

"Ya!" Chance said grinning. And daddy was JEALOUS of him:)

It sounds like a good song....

2010-03-14T23:56:00.001-06:00

We were playing a new CD in the kitchen when Chance commented that he wished he could understand the words to the song because it sounded like it was a nice song." I just don't understand what it is saying."

"You don't hear the words?" I asked him.

"Some of them I do, but some of them I don't, he responded.

"It is a nice song, maybe we'll have to put this song on your ipod so you can learn the words. I told him.
Chance shook his head in the affirmative. "Yes. The music sounds really nice and I want to know the words too."

I was impressed that Chance thought the song was nice. He was getting the melody, just not all of the words. It is saying a lot about Chance's hearing abilities when he hears things off in the background. Whatever background noises he picks up has to compete with his baby sister learning to chatter or crying; his other siblings talking, singing or playing; and whatever noises me and his dad may make as we go about our daily business. Not to mention the beeping of the microwave, the dishwasher, and other household noises. So the fact that he could hear enough to know he liked the melody of the song is incredible. With all of the activity in our house on a daily basis, is it any wonder Chance could not make out the words:)

Cooties

2010-03-07T22:03:00.000-07:00

Chance and I were enjoying a good read in the book,"Chicken Soup for the Kids Soul," when the concept of cooties came up. The story was talking about how in the 2nd grade, the author found out that girls have cooties. I turned to Chance and asked him if he knew what cooties were. He screwed up his face and said,"Cooties? What are cooties?!"

Ah, my innocent little boy. Apparently this hearing loss of yours has denied you of knowing one of life's worst kept secrets: boys and girls acquire cooties at a certain age. No one can exactly describe what cooties are, but everyone has known several people that have them.

Have you ever tried to explain what cooties are to someone else? I kind of just figured my kids would just 'know' when the time was right in their lives. Kind of like the same way they know how to walk at a certain time in their lives.

Maybe, the answer lies in the question. Maybe it just is not Chance's time to 'know' yet about the life stage that is cooties. Since he can hear just fine now, maybe his ears and mind will combine and confer on Chance the rite of passage that is the knowledge that the opposite sex does indeed have cooties. Whatever exactly those are.